id be excited but

its nice when you do your taxes and realize your getting a whole bunch of money back and could put that in your wedding account and be all "ooooooooooooooo" but then you go… oh… wait…. i have, like, a bizzilion dollars in bills that keep getting put off…..

SO. yeah. $2100 back…. and, like, $1000 of that to bills…. which im gonna have to figure out soon.

blarg.

had the past 4 days off work. Thursday was my bday, and i went to dinner with Roni, Mike, the boys, Carrie, Josh, and Chris at Applebees, and then we all had ice cream cake. didnt really get anything…. which im used to by now. Chris is taking me somewhere next week as his present. he was just working over my bday, so we couldnt. and we were going to go on "one of my off days" BUT I DONT HAVE AN OFF DAY.

and so hits the bad part of salary. 70 hours of work because apparently some big wigs came in while ive been off, and got all pissed off cuz of our inventory or something, and now me, mike, and Roger all have to work every day until its fixed. once i get the details tomorrow, im going to ask how long this is expected to last, because if its for awhile, im going to tell Roger that i need to, like, transfer stores and get a SOM position (front end) because I JUST CANT DO THIS WHEN IM PLANNING A GODDAMN WEDDING BY MYSELF BECAUSE MY BRIDESMAIDS LIED TO ME.

siriusly. they were all "just say what you need done, and well help" and everytime i bring something up, it just gets ignored.

and i cant take working 70 hours a week and trying to do that. i mean, now im going to lose a whole day that was supposed to be dedicated to my birthday present and only have a few hours instead, which makes me really sad. i mean, i cant take weeks of doing this. i cant take having only a couple hours every day to sit down and plan this. i know the big stuff is done… but how are chris and i supposed to go and register when i work till at least 5 every day, or how am i supposed to make an appointment to figure out my flowers, or get my dress sized, or sit down with Roni to get my invites made, or plan my ceremony, or figure out my centerpieces/decorations/favors or figure out my songs cuz i only have our first dance and the father-daughter dance figured out or find the bridal party gifts/parents gifts/groom gift or take Abby to get fitted for her flower girl dress or drag Chris to a store to pick out tuxes….

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

im going to go scream now. so ill write later. when i dont think im going to blow up so much.

bye