Yep
Yep, today was another day with the same ole same ole. Pokes, prods, threats, questions, games, musical people chairs, etc. It’s a nightmare.
They love to throw court threats at me. The thing is what they’re trying to threaten me about isn’t even something that would stand up in an honorable court, and they know this. I will use the term “honorable” loosely because money seems to make honor fly out the window. People lose a lot of legal battles because of colors such as white, brown, and green (money).
They know it’s some BS, and they’re muscling me because I’m one of the little people in a bad position. “She can’t pay her rent if we interfere with every income stream or employment opportunity possible, so she’ll be forced to {insert whatever the heck these people want from me}.”
I mean, you can’t have it both ways. Either I was valuable/knowledgeable/intelligent/capable of greater things, etc. and an asset, or I was an incompetent and worthless ole dummy who was just wasting space. I’m fine with either perception, but BOTH can’t be true. If the latter is true, what’s with all the commotion over where and how I try to earn my bill money these days? Who cares? I sucked anyway, so what’s the difference?
It’s the same with distant past personal relationships, too. Either I was a lovable and generally good person, or I was a total piece of garbage and every dirty name. If the latter is true, one should be happy they threw me away and move along.
Long story short, I really don’t know anything, and I don’t have anything. Please let me be.
I don’t want to be there, and I didn’t love the place or what it stood for. Their vibe was brutish. I had mostly nightmarish experiences there with a few moments of being distracted by an intriguing super or some cool toys.
The other establishment had always given me actual job satisfaction and no actual nightmares. Problems? Yes. Nightmares? No.
When the two somehow got mixed under the same roof, my mostly satisfactory environment got turned into a NIGHTMARE.
So forced compromise is not possible. It doesn’t work. Two different vibes and makes me not want to be there, either.
It’s gotta be one OR the other OR none.
I chose one, but if they don’t choose me back, option C it is, lol.
I felt like a lab rat earlier today, but I’m too tired to write about the experience. We’ll just say I had to play a game of musical chairs but with people. I imagine they wanted to see if I would recognize all the people and where they actually belonged.
Yep. I did.
Nope. I do not have autism or any mental health condition. What I have is a brain and a damn good memory, except when I don’t want to remember something.