*sigh*

Some days I wonder about the point of waking up.  I didn’t really accomplish all that much today…or at least that’s what it feels like although in reality I did a lot.  I finished my laundry, I mailed my court documents, I updated my whiteboard, I started my readings, I did several pages in both my scrapbooks (I have a personal scrapbook but I am also in charge of my pledge-class scrapbook).  I even reorganized my sock/underwear drawer!!  I mean jeez! 

I talked to my mom and my grandfather today, although very briefly.  I also completed my community service hours for the spring semester.  We are only required to have 3 (in addition to our 2-3 adopt-a-highways that we do as a chapter and one house-warming day).  I did 3 1/2 hours this morning at the arts center which kind of double as a community center whenever there is a holiday.  That’s on top of the hours I plan on getting in February with the Special Olympics basketball tournament.

I think I managed to make Hunter upset finally.  We were hanging out Thursday, we’d gone to see Four Christmases (which was kind of cute btw, it’s a good movie though I do recommend waiting til it’s on DVD or you can see it for really cheap).  We were hanging out at his place and he was like "You should go soon, I have to finish packing for tomorrow and study for my last 2 exams."  I wasn’t put out by this at all because I completely understood, school comes first for both of us.  But I went and put my coat on and instead of walking me to the door he just kind of ignored it.  I went out and said bye to Jayson then went back to say goodbye to Hunter.  He just continued to put his laundry away even though I was standing in the doorway, jacket on, keys in hand.  Went back out to talk to Jayson, said goodbye to him again, and then left.  It really hurt my feelings that Hunter would just be that way.  And now he apparently isn’t speaking to me suddenly.

He was supposed to stop by on his way out of town on Friday.  I texted him about the time I knew he’d be finishing up with his exams.  Nothing.  Called him about an hour or two later, immediate forwarding to voicemail, I figure he’s in a meeting or something and he’ll get back to me.  Finally 9pm rolls around, by now he’d have to have left for home so I call, still no answer although it actually rings this time.  I leave a message.  No response.  Still no response today so I send him another text around noon just saying Hi, nothing else.  It’s now 1:15am…still nothing.

I think he’s mad at me, don’t know why though.  If anything I should be the one mad considering he basically started ignoring me Thursday night…instead I’m hurt and only minorly annoyed.  I should be righteously pissed off….but I’m not.  That’s a sad state of affairs if you ask me.  And it’s not fair.

What’s worse is that I’m sitting here giving my big sis, who is now dating Jayson, advice on handling this tiff that she and he have been in since last night.  He forgot about hanging out with her and in response she hung out with her ex (who she has continued to have strong feelings for) for 2 hours, alone, with no communication to the outside world.  A little sketchy?  Yeah.  So then Jayson apparently met these sisters at a friend’s place and he was supposed to Facebook them so he wrote their names down on his hand so he didn’t forget.  And that hurt my big’s feelings…

Oy.  I told her that they both were screwing up last night and that she shouldn’t decide to do anything right now until she and he have had a chance to sit down and talk, for real and serious, talk.  And that probably won’t happen until we come back from winter break.  So I told her to take this time as a chance to relax and clear her head and cool down over it, try to see it from his perspective and all that.

How much does it suck to give other people relationship advice when you can’t keep a single relationship?  It sucks…a lot.  The worst part is it’s not my fault I don’t have a relationship.  I just have bad taste in guys or I pick guys that just don’t want me.  Case in point, Hunter, who can’t make up his mind what he wants half the time, and the other half he is conflicted about whether or not dating me is going to interfere with his faith…

Yeah, welcome to my crap-tastic life.

~*~*~Blessed Be~*~*~