Worth it

Graduation is next week but right now I am on a poorly-planned last-minute trip to Florida with Cindy for the long weekend.  Even though we are about to be roommates again, we haven’t done anything like this just the two of us in a long time, so I am enjoying it.  There are two parts to the trip, we are right now with Megan and Lauren in Miami, but tomorrow we are going to cross the state and visit the house my moms just bought.  They are still up in Boston so Cindy and I will have the place to ourselves and that should be peaceful.

The house that they bought is on the property of a nudist resort and this will be my first chance to go nude since the surgery.  I think I am going to be comfortable with it, but I haven’t fully decided.  Worst-case scenario is I will only go topless.  The weather is wonderful so I am looking forward to just spending some time on the beach here in Miami and by one of the pools tomorrow at the resort.  We don’t really have anything else planned.  

I’m not really excited about graduation next week.  I had no intention of attending it because that just didn’t interest me, but my mom got upset when I told her that and then went so far as to say she wouldn’t give me the graduation gift she had for me if I didn’t attend my graduation.  Not sure if she was bluffing,  but I figure I would do it if it means that much to her.

Dressing nicely has never been my strong point, and I’m struggling with what to wear.  I feel like I should wear a dress and heels and make myself pretty but some people have said there’s no point in any of that because I’ll have the gown on anyway. Not sure that the right answer is.  I went shopping last weekend with Cindy and I kept picking up casual clothes, even with the graduation outfit in the back of my head.  I always think about getting new running clothes and stuff to wear to work (it’s a mostly casual office) but then suddenly I’ll be invited to a nice place for dinner and I feel like I have nothing to wear.

A month from now I should be completely moved into the new place.  We have until July first here, but I’d like to not be rushing to get it done at the last minute.  My moms will be moved out by mid-June so I will have plenty of time to move in.  We’ve been bargaining with them about what they are going to leave behind for us since the house is so much bigger than we have furniture to fill, although I feel bad asking for anything from them since we are already living mostly rent free.

Tonight Lauren is cooking dinner for us and I’m looking forward to it since she cooks really well.  She has lost a bunch of weight and I’m really proud of her.  She’s still quite big but it’s great progress.  I told her how great she looked when we got here last night and she seemed a little uncomfortable with the compliment, but I really meant it.

Me, on the other hand.  I’m finally back on hormones, which is great thing.  After surgery it was a little annoying to have a feminine body suddenly but to not have the feminine hormones to go with it.  Now I feel complete.  But I am adjusting to hormones after having been off them for a while.  I’m crying about everything, I have gained 8 pounds, and I’m dealing with acne again.  Totally worth it though.