Paper Dolls

I’m going to do the one thing I hate tomorrow. I’m going to dress up for this guy I like. I hope he notices me. I really do. I’ve never gone to the extreame of changing my appearance. Even though dressing up for me isn’t a big thing at least I don’t think so. My friends on the other hand always seem to make it one. I guess it’s because I seldom dress up. Don’t get me wrong I have nothing against dresses it’s all the making up that goes along with it. I have to find my other black boot to go with my outfit tomorrow. It’s going to be one cute outfit and I’m going to look great. Yes, I am, you know why. Because I’m confident in myself, that I can make myself look great.

But at the same time I’m as phony as the popular girls and paper dolls. Sometimes it seems stupid to go through all this just for a guy. But I don’t want him to see me as one of the guys, I want him to see me as someone who is pretty and sure of herself. That’s who I want Brett to see. I’ve known him for almost a year now. He’s a real sweet guy. With a terrific smile, the kind that makes you melt to a puddle of water. And when he looks at you with his blue eyes you feel like putty in his hands. At least I do, when I’m around him I feel so comfortable and happy. I feel all tingelly all over and everything. Heck I being mushy over this guy, that doesn’t happen often.

My dad, littlest brother, and myself were at Blockbuster getting movies Saturday night and he was working. I secretlly hoped that he would be the one to rent the videos to us and at the same time I kind of didn’t want him to. I’m the real shy type of person when it comes to the flirting game. I think Brett knows that. Well he started talking to me and we talked back and forth the whole time. He handed the videos to me personally instead of putting them on the little shelf thing that most of them doing. He made it a point to touch my hand. It was weird. He smiled at me the whole time, I felt great like I was in heaven or something.

Well on the way out my dad had said something like Oh, he was very talktive to you. And I was all like it’s just Brett dad. Well turns out I ended up going on for four mintues about him and told my dad I wouldn’t be talking about him if he hadn’t said what he had. My dad said I was the one who kept the conversation going on about him. Then we pulled up in the driveway and my dad asked me if I wanted to countiune talking about not talking about Brett. That stopped me but I think if the sun had been out Dad would of seen me blushing but he couldn’t so I’m glad. No one could see the shade of red I had turned.

He kept starting at me in lunch on Monday it was nice. He had made it a point to sit with his friends but facing me. It was cute. I’m glad he did. Because I got to see his face to. Oh how great I felt. How great I feel now. I can’t believe I’m going through all this for him. It makes no sense. Am I going crazy? Have I lost my mind? Do I really like him? Does anyone have answers?