Misunderstood

It’s 2:30 in the morning and all I want is someone to be on-line to talk too. Don’t get me wrong it is kind of nice not to get a million messages at once. But sometimes there are people I want to talk to, and well tonight happens to be one of those nights. I’m growing impatiant of my mood at the time.

I feel completly misunderstood. I feel like no one out there even gets me sometimes. But you know I know someone does, but maybe I just don’t want to admit it anymore. Cause I’ve not spoken to that person about things for a long time. Well a few weeks not a long time. I swear I’m so pathitic for writing an entry about this.

King called me at work to let me know that he would be over at the Sarah’s and after the meeting Cox and me could come over if we wanted too. Cause Cox was suppose to go over there at like 8 but didn’t show up. So he called me to let me know all this. King got me worried about Cox. It’s not like him to just not show up somewhere. He got to work finally and told me what had happened. He’s not feeling to well. And he had fallen asleep. I felt bad for him. You could tell he didn’t feel well.

So much going on inside my head right now. So much and not enough time to process it all. So many things I want to say to people and not enough courage to say them. So many things I want and so many things I’m not granted. For once I would like everyone who actually reads my entries to leave me a note. Instead of reading it and going on their way. It at least lets me know they were here.

I hear from people how they read my od all the time and know if I update it or not. I’m like what? I didn’t know you read it. I kind of would like to know who does. It makes me realize hey I know who is reading this. So I know not all my words of nothing are falling on deaf ears.

To wish for love and being in love or two different things. To wish is to never know and to be is a true gift

~Sonja~