Truly This Is What Made Me

So…

Sunday night we had sex. Great sex. Mind blowing, split you open sex but Orgasmless sex all the same.I think I’ve figured why. I think the original attraction has long gone due to her Lil’ Miss Psycho episodes that she has and the tantrums that she throws, so what to do? Keep the wheels in motion. It won’t be for much longer. I just need to get me through to the summer and then I’m going to turn and say “d’ya know what I don’t need this shit from you” when we have a big row and then I’m going to tell her I’m going to find me somewhere else to live.” However, in the meantime I to get a new job because when I do this I won’t be able to stay where I am because it’s a) too close for comfort and b) too far away from where I’ll be moving to.

I was right, she has slipped back into her old ways and I think part of it is the spoilt brat within, however the other half is sheer paranoia methinks, take yesterday morning for example, I asked her to bring something downstairs to me (she was upstairs at the time) and she said she didn’t know where it was…I told her she’d left it in the window sill (which is directly opposite the bedroom entrance) and she muttered something which when I asked her to repeat it she muttered again, so as I was going upstairs to ask her what she’d said I sigh “fucks sake”, it wasn’t in a nasty tone or a spiteful tone or anything like that, well that was it she had a Lil Miss Psychosis episode on me and tried to start a row, I explained myself but she didn’t want to listen and accused me of having a go and trying to start a row and blah blah blah, to which I asked why it is that whenever she thinks anyone else is being funny with her she gives them the benefit of the doubt and asks them if they’re being funny with her but when it’s me I don’t get the same treatment she just rips my head off my neck, which I think is a little unfair tbh. Today she tried the same trick, so I told her to get her meds increased if this is how she’s feeling because it’s not me it’s her, when she denied that I asked if it’s money related as I’ve been noticing a pattern that whenever I’m due money in she’s as nice as pie to me but then when she’s got my money that niceness disappears pretty pronto and she becomes vile all over again, is that just too much of a coincidence? Well whatever it is I know how to play this game from watching Oh-so-many people play it on me.