Rolling Around

 Ah, diary! I can’t believe I’ve been through two days without suffering from depressive thoughts. It feels so liberating, I just had to tell you! And now, I don’t know what else to say. Hrm.

Thinking about it, I can trace back why this is so. Normally during vacations, I still have these thoughts bothering me. Now I’ve found other things to bother myself with. PSP, a good book, and a lack of Facebook. I’m such a simpleton, diary! But really. It works.

Yesterday, my family and I went back to our rural home to pay our respects to my late grandfather. I packed up Angels and Demons by Dan Brown since entertainment there pretty much revolved around children’s laughter and the usual old wives’ tales. I didn’t want to bring my PSP for precautionary measures in case it rained. It happened to my DS before. I’m not gonna take chances.

The bus trip we rode on at 10 AM was hellish. Being seated at the front, I was drenched in burning sunlight. Not to mention the traffic and dust. I managed to survive the one-hour trip with the aid of my MP3. Music makes bus rides more awesome than they really are. Other than that, it was the sole source of relief available; a temporary escape from reality, perhaps? 

I’ve done nothing all day but to lay around on the couch reading A&D. Despite having read it already before, it is still very engaging and fun to read. The rest of the family went to the cemetery, and I was left alone at home. I chose to do so, because I’ve developed a mild fever later in the day (I admit, it was scary being alone in there). I wondered if it was because of the bus ride torment or from the sore throat. I’d be quite worried if it was by the latter– sore throat can progress as a descending infection and manifest as rheumatic heart disease if I’m unlucky. And I’m usually unlucky. Gah.

Funny thing is, mother was worried for the same thing. But she didn’t know exactly what it is. I think she remembered the trivia I’ve told her exactly about this some time ago. I don’t think she remembered that I was the one who told her about it, though. Well, because of that, she kept insisting that I take antibiotics. I got angry on instinct, because it has been inculcated in my mind that careless intake of these may cause resistance. But I do appreciate the gesture. She made me feel cared for. Having her is an exception from my unlucky streak.

When we finally got back, it was already around 9 PM. I still wasn’t feeling sleepy, having spent the rest of the day in a laze. So I picked up my PSP I charged early that morning. It has been a long time since I’ve played with it. I probably got bored with the games. However, the other day I remembered that I had games in my laptop that I still haven’t tried. One of them was Me and My Katamari.

I played Call of Duty earlier that day while I was waiting for the others to get ready. Haven’t touched MMK yet. I was quite curious. Then, boom. Mindblown.

From early morning ’til afternoon I’ve faced nothing but seriousness for pastime. Call of Duty wasn’t some laughing matter, and Angels and Demons was about some awesome blend of history, religion, and science. I wasn’t quite prepared for this.

The opening scene was… 

I don’t know how to describe this thing. It had evoked multiple emotions simultaneously, and confused isn’t quite the fitting word.
I found it funny, distracting, odd, and distracting again. I was laughing. Then my brows arched. I weirded out. I’m pretty sure most will find this game hilarious, but, yeah, I did too. But it was just so weird.

I took a liking to this man called the King of Cosmos. The moment I first saw him, I was immediately reminded of Garland, the Final Fantasy antagonist, and the sworn enemy of the character I used to role play. It was so nostalgic, because I really liked Garland; both the character and the role player I know of. I thought of Garland because of the weird thing on his head that extended laterally. Garland has horns on his helmet extending the same way. Not that they looked even remotely alike… I just have weird imagination.

Me and My Katamari has a unique gameplay. You roll around a spherical thing called a Katamari, and things get stuck on it, getting bigger and bigger as more fall victim to it. It can start out from small candies, progressing to bicycles, people, buildings, UFOs, whatever. Then the King of Cosmos will turn it into islands, giving them to homeless animals. Lolwut. But, yeah.

I was addicted for a while, especially because it had nice BGMs accompanying the game. It wasn’t as depressing as Call of Duty that you die because you stupidly run towards a tank due to confusing controls. The only reason I had to stop was because of my physical limitations. My eyes felt tired. My hands were in pain– specifically the base of my thumbs. I hated the PSP because of its thinness. I had to grip it in an uncomfortable manner while continually holding down buttons to roll the Katamari. I was scared again. I didn’t want to end up developing yet another chronic problem like hand pain.

But, yeah. I was happy. It lifted up my mood. Whenever I faced the mirror, the pale, distressed stranger isn’t there anymore. I now know how to create my personal happy pill. Roll around a couple of stuff, some sumo wrestlers maybe, and I am satisfied. I know that this won’t make my problems go away, but then again, I also shouldn’t spend too much time thinking about them as well. I mean, my problems aren’t even immediate– they’re things I’m anxious about for the future. Anxious because I have no sure way of controlling it. I mean, who can?

The future is known only to itself. I should listen to what my role play character says. He’s very optimistic. And I’m the worrywart.
—

Hngh. My left palm still hurts though I’ve stopped playing three hours ago. The price I have to pay, maybe? I’ve always wondered how acupuncture is. They say it’s painless, and it relieves tension here and there. I actually imagine this when my hand or back acts up, and I feel a gradual release from some non-existing heaviness. I’m scared to try because I don’t know any trustworthy practitioners around. Might get HIV and other nasty stuff if you’re careless.

… Well, that was off-topic.