5/31/05

I heard the sirens tonight, and so I walked.  I followed the sound and when I found them…

…I was so mad.  Mad that it was something so stupid and unimportant.

To me, at least. 

So I turned around, my feet a bit heavier and the sky darkening.

And I felt like crying.  I don’t really know why.  But my face flushed and my throat tightened.

I wanted to do what she did today – scream and cry and choke and throw a tantrum.

Just so I can yell, "I don’t know what’s wrong with me and nothing ever seems to fix it!"

It just makes me forget.

I’m starting to want to run away again.

I can’t take this being alone.