4/26/05

Today was a busy day…but mainly in my head.

Child Development passed without much fanfare – most of us were just trying to keep our eyes open.  Then we trekked to Graham Street where Jaime told us the news.  My heart is still clenched up with pain because I don’t know what to do for her, how to be there for her.  She has my number and she knows she can call anytime, but this is one of those situations where you don’t know what to say or how to feel.  Jaime’s strong – she doesn’t want our pity.  But everyone can use support, even her.  She told us not to walk on eggshells around her, so, slowly and delicately, we resumed our usual banter and devoured our normal giant cookie.

But my heart still hurts for her.

In Ed. Plur., we talked about tracking and I’m still up in the air about that issue.  I was tracked all through my elementary, middle, and high school years, and always had positive experiences.  But things have changed since I was little – and there are so many patterns, variations, and opinions when it comes to tracking.  I’ll have to come back to this…

Since it was Tuesday, there was no O&P, but Anne showed a video.  It was a follow-up to “Educating Peter” – if you’ve never seen these movies, I would really suggest that you do.  They’re so touching.  The follow-up piece was called “Graduating Peter” and it broke my heart.  And it made me question inclusion.

And it made me not want to wait to have kids.  As I get older, I know that my chances of having a child with Down’s syndrome increases, and that scares the crap out of me.  I don’t know how I would handle having a child with a severe physical, emotional, or mental disability, and I know I can reduce my chances of having this happen by having children while I’m young.

At least I know I’m ready.

Alecia and I had a great discussion for my TA eval this afternoon – we talked for almost 40 minutes and I really started to feel more comfortable around her.  She’s a really great person – I hope I’ll get to know her more outside of the center.  And I’m very excited about Thursday!  🙂  I’m going to head out and get some pop for it in a bit.  Maybe I’ll pick something else up on Thursday after work…maybe those super good cookies!  🙂

Off to the store, then homework and TV and continuing to make plans for the summer and the fall and the next year or two of my life.

Smile.  I will.  🙂