murder to excellence

How was my week, you ask?

 

I have committed a felony and done something I promised myself I’d never ever do.

 

I got distracted while driving down my street and hit my neighbor’s car. My car lost, his didn’t have a scratch that I could see

so I freaked out and drove away. it was late at night, but someone surely saw it. I’m just waiting for that to catch up with me.

Who the fuck am I?

What kind of person does this?

 

Also, I met someone that might a little bit be my soulmate

but I fucked it up so bad there is no chance.

I had about 5 minutes of rushed sex with him, without telling him I had herpes.

I’m almost positive he’s safe, he was wearing boxers and a condom.

 

again

what the fuck am I?

who is this person?

I have to tell him

and it’s going to break my heart

I’ve broken my own heart

 

I’m just counting down the days until I can retire and become a crazy cat lady.

phoebe