closer to the sun
last night
woah
I got drunk
and not just a little
and I um
had very nice drunken unprotected coitus with my neighbor
whoops
or not whoops?
And this morning he made me coffee while I waited to wake my roommate (who locked me out) up
which is why I’m awake right now
No mention of the fact that we had unprotected sex and I have herpes
or the fact that we were gonna wait….?
or the fact that he said he was really feeling his alone time…3 days ago
no expectations
except, this is only guy #4
and I don’t really count #3
and I get emotionally attached very easily
very easily
and I have no idea what is going to happen next
probably nothing
hopefully more sex though,
our chemistry is crazy
when he got up this morning I watched him walk around and thought how incredibly attracted to him I am
and how I’m going to get hurt
I always get hurt
I sometimes wonder if this is some sort of self flagellation
whatever
there isn’t much left of my battered heart anyways