Under the knife?

I’m 43 years old, and for whatever reason I’ve managed to avoid having any surgeries so far. There’s a fairly high chance that streak might be coming to an end, possibly this month or the next.

I’ve been taking CT scans of my chest for a few years now every six months as a precaution for something, and the last one I took in March brought back a result that has concerned the doctors taking care of me. Here’s the issue: I have a mass, about the size of a small cherry… inside my right lung.

Now before anyone gets on their high horse, I do not and have never smoked a thing in my life. Zero. Ziltch. Sweet fuck all. Right now my doctors think the #1 suspect for my mass might be the biologic IV I’ve been taking to relieve my symptoms/pain with AS. I was aware this was a risk before I started taking it, but the odds were very, very low. I think it’s time to buy a lottery ticket…

Right now they’re debating whether to do a biopsy by sticking a needle in me, or to do surgery and just remove the mass completely and test it after. If asked, I would probably prefer the surgery. If they biopsy came back positive, I’d have to have the surgery anyway, so I’d prefer to do one than risk doing both.

I’m not prepared to toss around the C word just yet, but I am preparing for it just in case. I have kept this situation to myself, as the only people in my life I’ve told so far is my father, and his new wife who happens to be a nurse. I don’t want to start a panic, especially if there’s a chance this might come back as negative. My plan is to keep this on the down low as long as I can. And hardly anyone I know reads this diary, so this doesn’t count.

So that’s the latest update, which sucks balls. It’s a good thing one of my friends cancelled the road trip months ago, cause I would have had to cancel it due to medical reasons. We are making plans to try again next year.

I’m okay right now. I’m not panicking because at the moment there is nothing to panic about… yet. When I have a reason, then I will. It’s times like this that forces someone to reflect, to appreciate what is really important. I’ve been doing that a lot lately.

Regardless of what happens, I will come back and keep everyone in the loop. If I have my way, you guys are going to be stuck with this annoying bastard for a lot longer.

Take care,

Peter