For Wende

Written by Sink or Swim

Tonight, I’m asking you to take a moment and light a candle. Tonight, take a moment, and stop whatever you’re doing. Take a moment and light a candle. Light a candle for the life that has been lost, and the lives that must now struggle to find a way to go on without him. Think of Wende, who has lost her best friend, her partner, the father of her children, the love of her life. Think of three-year-old Malori who has lost her Daddy, who will never get another kiss goodnight from him, who will never again be able to run to the door when he returns home for work, who won’t have her father to walk her down the aisle on her wedding day. Think of Kali, who has also has lost her father. Think of Austin and Paige. Think of Kevin’s parents, Byron and Jill. Of Wende’s parents… of Bob, who must, unnecessarily, be feeling an enormous amount of guilt for ever letting him get off that boat. Think of his brother who spent three hours diving, searching desparately to find him; think of what that had to have been like, and think of what he’s going through now… having not been able to find him.

Tonight, take a moment and light a candle. Tonight, take a moment, stop… and don’t let life go on as if nothing has happened and as if everything is okay.

And, if you can, please, take a picture and send it to me (olson_sh@yahoo.com). Or, even better, post it in your diary. Within the next few days, I will post an entry of my own with all of pictures. And I’ll find a way to make a physical memorial – probably in the form of a scrapbook – and get them to Wende, as well.

It may not be much, but it’s all that I can think of. It’s the only way I know of for us, in the absence of words, to show her how much we care, how much we’ve been affected, how much we are hurting for her… and for us to show her that we all here.

We’re here for you, Wende girl. We don’t know what to say, we don’t know what to do… but we’re here for you. We’re here for you, and we love you, and we will do whatever we can for you.

Even though I don’t know Wende or her family my heart still breaks for them. I can’t imagine loosing the father of my children, the man I love, my best friend in a way so tragic and sudden.  I wish that there was something that I could do or say that would take even a little bit of pain away for you. I know there is nothing that can for you right now. You are in my thoughts and prayers.