Glamorous Indie Rock & Roll

I seem to have turned into a completely mardy bitch at the moment. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I can’t even blame it on hormones cos it’s virtually constant. I’m so sick to death of the so-called dramas of my work colleagues that I can barely hold a conversation with them sometimes. It’s really trivial and I don’t want to be a mardy bitch, I want to be happy/excited/stressed/worried with them or for them but right now, it’s all I can do to refrain from shouting, "That’s not a fucking problem, you drama queen!" Maybe it’s them and not me. I mean, I manage to refrain from being mardy with Duncan, unless he absolutely deserves it. I don’t know. I seriously think I have a hormone imbalance that’s just not been picked up by the doc yet. I had my liver & kidney scan last week and got a letter from the doc asking me to make another appointment. That can’t be good, right? I mean, if there was nothing wrong, why would they want to see me again? It’s hardly for my sparkling wit and dazzling conversation. My mother is no help whatsoever. When I told her I’d had the liver/kidney scan, she said, "That’s how they found my kidney cancer, during a liver scan." Oh fucking joy, mother, as if I didn’ t feel worried about this whole thing enough!

Aside from the doc, I’m off to see a nutritional therapist this weekend. I’m hoping for something to help combat the pcos/luteal phase defect. Ideally, I’d like a miracle cure, but I’m guessing it won’t possible. As long as she doesn’t demand I give up chocolate forever and eat raw vegetables, we should be OK.

Everything else, aside from work and mardy bitchiness, is good. Zoe’s becoming more and more independent by the day. She refuses to let us even help brush her teeth most of the time. The problem is, to her, brushing her teeth is sucking off the toothpaste and then chewing the toothbrush for a couple of minutes. lol. She does a great fake cry thing as well. Well, it’s great if you’re someone else I’m sure. However, when you’ve witnessed it for the 10th time that morning and it’s only 9am, it’s a little wearing at times. She is, however, an utter delight most of the time, so I can’t really complain all that much.

Work is soul destroying and I’m sure it’s contributing to the mardy bitchiness. I just don’t care any more. I’m working my ass off for little or no credit, below average pay and I can’t even get excited about the programmes any more because it’s just bad MTV reality shit or poker. Who the fuck watches poker, let alone watches it with the damn subtitles on?! I think I’m burned out in the subtitling game, quite frankly. Yet another reason to get myself knocked up as quickly as possible. If we didn’t need the maternity pay, I’d leave now.

Until there is a next time…

xx