Chug, chug, chuggin along!!!
What a beautiful spring day we are having today!!! Almost 70 degrees and a warm southernly breeze blowing!!! Small showers off and on but the sun peeks out every now and then!!! Ahhhhhhhh…..sweet paradise!! I was able to sit out on my deck this morning and have my coffee and toast while I read my morning devotionals and it was so nice!! I’ve now had my bath and am dressed for the day….I’ve placed my Avon order online for this campaign and should be getting back to purging my bedroom but here I sit!! I’m trying to talk myself out of going to the park with the dog (Odie) and spending the day enjoying the weather but I’m not sure yet which will win….park or purging!! LOL I’ll probably purge until Nevaeh gets home and then we will all go to the park….there that works!! Let’s see……what else to write about so I can put off the closet a little longer!! Ummmmmm…..well I have an inner struggle going on that I am not sure what it’s about yet. Waiting for God to show me but I just feel very…very….very unsettled….it’s hard to explain the feeling but it’s kind of like I should know something but don’t???? Does that make any sense?? Probably not but that’s the closest I can come to describing it. My walk as a Christian is relatively new and as a baby Christian I am probably at the crawling stage so all this is pretty new to me. I don’t know what God is putting in my heart yet, but I do know that He is trying to tell me something so I am being patient and hoping to figure it out soon….I know that when the time is right I’ll know. It’s times like these though, that I wish for a pastor to guide me but alas I have yet to find a church. I am not looking for a place to go to once or twice a week and then everyone goes their separate ways and talks about every one else until the next week. I know that happens everywhere and no one can be perfect all the time but I despise hypocrisy and do not want it to ruin the experience I am having now as a Christian. I am fighting internally still the belief or should I say non belief in mankind….because of my past experiences I have become very jaded and I want to find that child like faith once again….the ability to believe the best and not the worst about people or situations. It’s hard for me but I am getting better at it and I know that if I get into the wrong environment and have to deal with a bunch of church goers who claim to be Christians just because they attend church and then live carnally the rest of the time I will begin to rethink the path I’m on and backslide back into the way I was. So I think for now until I am able to mature more in my walk I need to just worship on my own. I’m also looking for an "old-fashioned" congregation that socializes within the church group as well and that too is getting harder to find. But for now I am just chuggin along….figuring it all out a little at at time…..I’m not where I need to be but thank God I’m not where I was!! (Thank you Joyce Meyer for that little saying!) Well that’s all for now….my closet calls!!