Patrisha

February 14, 2013

Not about the Move

So, today I am going to write about something other than The Move! {Looks out of the window at the cheering crowd and bows graciously!}

Yesterday I had a surprising and interesting thought –well, it was for me– and that is that this apartment is the first place I have lived in my seventy-eight years where I have no one to please but myself. When I was right out of college, my first job was at a residential school. Part of my salary was a small already-furnished apartment and we ate at the school with our students. Then I moved on to other teaching jobs but I always lived in a furnished apartment and, because teachers are woefully underpaid, I always had a room mate.

When I married, my now-ex was in the Air Force and we moved around a lot. We had furniture but it was mostly what he liked and I went along with it because, well, it didn’t matter too much to me so why not agree to keep the peace? I was never much of a home maker. Fifteen different schools in twelve years and my mother being an alcoholic who ran away from her family regularly added to my feelings that where I lived and what surrounded me was not particularly important. When my then-husband retired, we built a house but it was not at all how I wanted it. I wanted a house that was partially underground and had a central atrium, but this was in a very conservative state and I was living among my in-laws, so I just shrugged, gave in and had a house that looked like everyone else’s. When I moved in with Fred, the apartment was his and the furniture was his, arranged how he chose to do it and I was happy enough with his choices.

Then came the time when we moved from the small upstairs apartment to the larger downstairs apartment, and we had to buy furniture and rearrange things. It was then I got the feelings of This is where *I* live! How do *I* want it to be? And Fred, bless his heart, encouraged me but, of course, he had input and I went along even when I really didn’t like things. {Like this too-soft beige couch!} So, here I am in the apartment where I intend to live for the rest of my life getting ridiculously excited about bathmats! And bedside lamps! Can you believe I spent two whole hours on line last night looking at bedside lamps until I found something I liked? I sit here looking at this apartment and all sorts of ideas are spinning in my mind. Since I use a cane all the time now, yesterday I bought a cane holder on line. An actual place to put my canes! {I had them propped up against the wall in a corner at the previous apartment.} And, I have decided, I am eventually going to replace this sofa with one that isn’t beige or too soft! It will be a slow process getting this place the way I want it because after so many years of either not caring or deferring to others, I am not actually sure what I want, but I am going to enjoy myself finding out!

So, today I don’t feel as high energy as I did yesterday, but I feel well so Things will be done! I am just not yet clear on what things…

Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.

– Oscar Wilde

Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone. ~Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers}

Tornado

February 15, 2013

That’s the way I feel about this house. Even though it was my parents and not at all what I would buy for myself, I am making it my own. Now if I could just figure a way to move it to the country with out much money or fuss! LOL!! Enjoy!!!!

its a good feeling 🙂

wutabouttharum

That’s awesome..I’m glad you get a space all of your own and to call it your own and decorate it how you want…just a random noter stopping by 🙂

jjjtripled

Good for you!!! There does come a time when we know what we want…..it takes some of us longer than others. I didn’t know what I really appreciated and enjoyed until a few years ago.

TheWoodsprite

Aw, I am so glad you get to buy the things YOU like best, and arrange things the way YOU want them! :o) !! That is so interesting, that this is the first time in your life you have only had to please yourself. I guess I have never really had that experience either, except maybe a little bit during my college years. I had no room-mate but I did live on the third floor of my German professor’s house. I am loving hearing about how this adventure is unfolding for you! :o) !! hugs, Nicky

HippieChica15

I love picking things out for rooms. My favorite part of moving is rearranging and decorating my bedroom. It was the first thing I insisted upon when moving in with Tim. Enjoy making your space yours! *HUGS*

rapson Hussein michigan

I wonder if you could Craigslist a swap on sofas? Maybe pictures first and then a swap. Have you found the libraries and maybe a painting group? I bet you’ll love the spring down there-it lasts forever, then duck for summer-and then a very long wonderful fall. be well;peace…dan

So it’s actually like you are just fining out who you really are!? That’s kind of cool!!!! Have fun picking your things out!!! And HOW FUN, picking your things out! Hugs,M

You’re reminding me of a friend whose life circumstances changed and she acquired a small house of her own. One day she visited me at work. She was wearing a wicked grin and I asked why. “I painted my bathroom” she said. “So?” I asked. “I painted it PURPLE” she replied. I asked why and she said, with great gusto, “Because I can!”

MargUK

I’m getting all excited for you as well! Of course we will need photos of what you choose to drool over so …… Job Number 665 – find the camera! 😀

lasergirl

As Siskel and Ebert would say—TWO THUMBS UP!!!

Kaly

I love having my own place! ryn: I agree, valerian has to be mixed with something to be palatable. The smell is so strong… maybe you can find it with your nose! (j/k) Take care,

Silverkitty

(huggles)

One of the things I really loved after my divorce — after I’d been through the hardest part of the pain of the loss of the only lifestyle I’d ever known — was buying my own townhouse and having it be all mine. I love that you are enjoying decorating your own space.

Telynor

I think it is a very good idea to put exactly what you want where you want it. And yes, you do have to please no one but yourself — revel in it.

Fun!

SphinxMinx

February 16, 2013

You’re nesting, Patrisha! I do understand being online shopping for furniture because I’ve been doing the same thing in preparation for buying our first house. I have always lived in rented houses, my Mum was only able to buy a house in the last 10 years. Here in Ireland, as in England most rental houses are furnished so I’ve not bought any substantial furniture for years. I’m enjoying it too!Have fun making your space entirely your own!

Good for you to have this kind of adventure now.

This is a lovely entry to read Patrisha. You may not feel totally energetic, but there is an energy to your excitement about finally discovering what it is that you would like and creating a home for yourself. Great.