11/20/2013**
Yesterday I had an EKG, hmm, is that right? Anyway it is the test where lots of sticky things are slapped on one here and there to check the heart. Then because there was a vacancy where someone didn’t turn up I got to have an echogram? Again, I forget the names but remember the experience. {If there hadn’t been an unexpected vacancy, it would have meant yet another trip on another day} This is the very interesting test where I get to see my heart chugging away! I have had this before but I didn’t remember the bit where she pressed the doohicky {note my technical term!} into my lower throat to see my heart from the top view and into my lower abdomen to see the bottom of my heart! I find it amazing that my heart has been beating away all by itself for 80 years…
Anyway, I have one more test to do which is the nuclear test which, again, I have had done before. I assume all these test before surgery are because of my age. {Which reminds me. This doctor is the only one that said she would send for my records from Vermont! I was impressed.} This last test is early in December. This makes me think that the actual surgery won’t be until the New Year. I am tired of the waiting. It is hard not to be anxious all the time. Sleep is difficult at the best of times. These days, in order to get enough sleep I have gone back to what I consider the bad habit of napping during the day. 
This evening Jake and I are going out to eat. {We were going last weekend but what with one thing and another, it never happened.} Anyway, when we were coming home from the doctor’s yesterday, I mentioned to Jake that I was sorry but he was my only source of getting-out-of-the-house these days and there were times I was very lonely. When I am over all this medical stuff, I will go back to finding people I like and have the same interests as I do. I had already started with the one art class I had attended and I had plans to go back to learning Italian. {I would, I think, pretty well have to go back to the beginning! Skills unused deteriorate!} But, as I told Jake, for the time being, he is my only source of adult conversation! He seemed pretty calm about this!
OK. I have a couple of loads of clean clothes to fold and put away! This of course means I can watch Netflix!
An emotion is only an emotion.
It’s just a small part of your whole being.
You are much more than your emotion.
An emotion comes, stays for a while, and goes away, just like a storm.
If you’re aware of that, you won’t be afraid of your emotions.
~Thich Nhat Hanh
If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment. — Marcus Aurelius
It seems to me that if the doctors thought your problem was serious, they would hurry the process along. Since they don’t, I would hope that’s a good sign. Either that, or they’re total incompetents. Take your pick. The heart is a miraculous organ, for sure.
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My father in law had to have these tests done before back surgery at age 65. Good thing he did…they found some problems that they were able to fix. He’s still waiting on the back surgery tho. Good luck with your tests!
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I would hate the waiting, too!!!!! And I would think that any doctor would send for a person’s medical records from a place they’ve recently moved. Do the others suspect that Vermont’s not a real place or something?! ;o) !! I’m glad you have Jake, and also the internet. But it’ll be wonderful when you’re able to get out and do the things you like doing again! hugs, Nicky
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I would hate the waiting, too!!!!! And I would think that any doctor would send for a person’s medical records from a place they’ve recently moved. Do the others suspect that Vermont’s not a real place or something?! ;o) !! I’m glad you have Jake, and also the internet. But it’ll be wonderful when you’re able to get out and do the things you like doing again! hugs, Nicky
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Good luck with all your tests. I am sure it can’t be easy to wait for results and the operation itself. Take care.
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OD is working again.. trying to read and not while I can. I was not able to come to your entry from my bookmarks page..instead had to go directly to your diary and then to the entry… it’s always something here it seems… at least things are not timing out! It sounds like you have a competent doctor and the tests went as planned.
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