Great risk

I just came from seeing “Tomb Raider”, and it left me with an unfilling sensation. I feel that it ended on more of a wimper. The earlier battle scenes contained more tension and drama than the finale, for me.

But, I wasn’t the target audience.

High school girls are.

And judging by the comments from the girls in the crowd, it hit the mark. The girls next to me turned to their mother behind them the moment the credits rolled and said, “You gotta buy that on DVD, mom!”

So I am looking back at what gave it such girl appeal where “Raiders of the Lost Ark” wouldn’t have. And a couple of lessons come to the front. The most notable of which, is: never talk trash on a girl’s dad. That was the sole tool they used by which to make the villian evil.

Very effective.

Anyway, I went to see the movie in a moment of self-pitious ambivalence about my evening. I was losing motivation; I just sat through a wedding rehearsal while fixing a computer at church, and I actually almost cried. I never cry at weddings!! *chuckling*…but true to my feeling the emotion for something out of context, I suppose I am going to start crying at ALL wedding rehearsals!

The point is, I was crashing again. Here it was, is..okay, was… a beautiful summer evening – some of the best weather this State has – and I was alone, in my car. What I wanted to be doing is gathering around a table on a deck someplace with fresh grilled food and a handful of friends. What I wanted to be doing was grooming the yard of a friend. I wanted to be outdoors doing. I wanted to be making a difference to someone. I wanted to be in the company of a friend.

I drove with a grump face, but managed to smile and wave as I passed gaggles of neighbors in lawn chairs in driveways. I went to get cash and drink at the grocery – decided to get water, and go to a movie.

Alone.

I hate that!

And, I was frustrated at myself because I have a particularly tiresome chore to complete this weekend, on the computer, and I really should have gone to do that.

But, leaving the movie, I am recharged. Much more myself. Validated. I did something for ME, and it made a difference.

…even if the movie was a bit weak. *g* No, seriously, it was “good”. Definate matinee material. Be a girl if you pay full price.

But, now my mind is churning. Very directed thought, very energized. This is the moment when I need to walk onto the scene of disarray, and clear things up. I am bulletproof, for the moment.

I’ve been thinking about shoes. *wink*

Anyway, “to get great reward, you’ve gotta take great risk”. I think thats a line in the movie, but its also a popular thought elsewhere right now. Is it true?

I was chewing on that, and on the surface, it appears so. Love is risk, and has the greatest reward, does it not? And also the greatest hurt.

But then I realized, no: to get great reward, you must give great service. The question – the risk, if you will – is in whom you serve. As for me and my house, I will serve the Lord. Who will give me all that I ask for and more. I only have to decide what I want! *smile, grin*

No, great risk only brings great thrills. Or great peril. There is nothing, I think, truely worth gaining from a great risk, except for that thrill, the scentilation, of engaging the risk.

Otherwise, great risk is something to be avoided. Our servicemen (have) taken great risks to secure the blessings of liberty, but I dare say not one of them would have chosen to risk their life, or the lives of their buds, their command, if it wasn’t necessary.

If the victory is sweeter, its because you survived. Not because the victory is any better. It is still the same reward, risk or non.

And so on that note, love SHOULD BE no great risk. And, ultimately, it isnt. We set ourselves up for the risk – we set our expectations well above the value of the actual reward, and we hazard ourselves not against love, but against the cruelties and shortcomings of the object of our love.

It seems to be that if your love is such a great risk, then maybe its not “your love” afterall. ?

Just chewing a rawhide here folks. Just cleaning my teeth and strengthing my gums. Anyone else care for a bite?