A falling dream’s not just a morbid sign

I
offer an apology for not updating.

When confronted by the big, white
space where I spill my secrets, my mind goes blank. There are no secrets except
the ones I can’t tell (at least not yet- not until they’re over). I start
focusing in on all the things I’ve said and done and wonder where to begin. How
do I record nearly three weeks? How do I record the everything and nothing? I’m
going to have to split it all up- to relive it all at once will be more than I
can handle (and, quite frankly, more than I’ll have time for since I’ll have to
do some work eventually).

A lot of the stories are old, and I don’t find
them particularly interesting. I got insanely drunk two weekends ago, but it’s
old news. Despite the fact that my roommates still find it necessary to discuss
my projectile vomit at least once per day. And I don’t really remember what I
did (but every time I hear something new that I did, I find myself happy that I
forgot). I have uttered the phrase, “I’m never drinking again,” a thousand times
in order to show everyone how much of an alcoholic I’m not.

My mother
found my handwritten journal, which is somewhat embarassing. She then proceeded
to ask me questions that were directly related to what I’d written, and I
answered the exact opposite of what she had read. It didn’t seem to bother
her.

I went to see Fall Out Boy last Thursday. They rocked, the opening
bands rocked, I jumped on top of a 12-year-old because he thought he was all
hardcore but was actually a foot shorter than me, I was astounded to find that
there were people there who had missed the eighties (that sucks), and I made a
boy fall in love with me and he wrote me a song. When I have access to the
lyrics he sent me, I shall post them. Maybe.

My roommates keep telling me
I’m emo (in between them talking about my drunken escapades TWO WEEKS LATER).
All because I want to make a shirt that says “I’m also ugly on the inside.” I
think it would be a kickass shirt. And I am not emo. You should leave me a note
and assure me that I am not emo.

Supposedly my sister is going to give me
photoshop. I’m very excited because I won’t have to use paint to change pictures
anymore. Prepare to be inundated with pictures that I will have made myself.
They will suck, but there will be a lot of them.

If anyone is going to be
in the State College area, they shold go to Prospectors restaurant. Because they
have good ribs, but more importantly, there’s a magician who will come around
and make this disappear and guess which card you’re thinking of!

I’m
obsessed with the song “Anchorless” by The Weakerthans. Go download it now. And
also “In the Morning, Before Work” by Owen. (The Owen song you can probably only
get off the Polyvinyl Records website.)

This is a terrible entry. More
things have happened than this. But the things that are most important to me
sound trivial written down. And hey, at least I’m updating at all.