mentally

i was cutting myself 2 months ago. not like the other people that cut their upper legs or under arms. i was cutting my fingers. they healed within a week which was good but also not that good. people like scars bc it reminds them of what happened in the past. i have none. i was using all kinds of patches to cover them up. but truth is people don’t look at the inside of your hands only the outside. u can apply that to many other body parts. with shoes too, people don’t usually look at shoes. i look at them. i like seeing  black boots on everyone. they’re beautiful. beautiful like the stars that surround us. i don’t sleep much nowadays. i fear i’m going insane. but that’s okay. we’re all insane a little bit. i skip class all the time. i don’t want to. it just kinda happens. i wasn’t cut out for school. i’m a hard worker at heart and school isn’t about that. school is gradual work. something that’s built up from the ground and up. until you do a test or a final project and forget about it forever. i guess that’s how most relationships and friendships work. but do u ever really forget someone? i don’t think so. the brain keeps memories that entertain itself or give some kind of nostalgia. it can erase bad memories easily or not at all.

that’s it for today thank u