Shadow Word DEATH!

Yeah so don’t hate me for the corny World of Warcraft reference in the title.  I couldn’t help myself.

My days and nights have managed to reverse themselves yet again and all of my diversions or distractions are incapacitated.  I have my books, but I can only read for so many hours before I grow weary of it, especially when the books in question have been read multiple times previously.  My computer has completely crashed beyond any redemption I am capable of performing.  I have no TV, nor do I desire one.  I could practice drawing but I really don’t feel like being confronted with my ineptitudes at the moment.  I don’t want to start on the 1000 piece puzzle because I’ll be moving soon and I don’t want to have to break it apart.  So here I am writing.

Maybe, the views I possess about love are as they are because I am incapable of true love.  Maybe, I am so self-concious and aware of my "imperfections" that it prevents me from ever fully trusting which is supposed to be a key component in love.  I do not know if this is true; it is just a musing, but perhaps that is why I can care so much for fictional characters.  When I imagine myself, I am without flaws or imperfections.  I can be who I want to be.  It’s like my mind is caged within a corporeal form, forced to deal with this reality, but constantly yearning to be elsewhere and free of the restrictions and responsibilities of the body.  

Maybe death is not the monster it is portrayed to be, nor the mysterious, undesirable entity associated with old age and sickness.  Maybe death is just an escape from all these things that plague my existence.