Losing My Marbles

Deep down, I’m just completely a one-guy type of girl.  I picked you and I focused on you and from the moment that happened, no one else existed in my world.  No other guy stood a chance. 

*sigh* I remember when fantasy and imagination were actually useful forms of escapism.  Now it just feels like my mind is broken…weak and incapable of any sort of valid respite. 

Time weighs too heavily on me.  I think I’m finally losing my grasp on childhood and it’s every bit as horrible as I ever imagined.  I seek some form of permanence.  I hate life.  I hate reality.  It’s not worth it at all.  It’s only fear of the unknown holding me back.  When did I become afraid of that?  I hate that too.