A summer’s day

Oh, most definitly “yes”, Oswego, most definitly “yes”!!! Thank you for your perception and your wisdom!

When I am too much with people I feel almost under seige; because I live with family, there is never a time anymore when I am alone. To be alone I must leave, meaning quality time alone is limited and on the fly. I feel it in my soul how this is hurting me. When we were all busy we also had blocks of time alone. I grow angry when I have to be around even my own relatives, though I love them. [Er

I know also that a diary is only a segment of our lives, one part of the whole, but it seems to me that you examine your youth as if yours is over. You are not an old man. Don’t act like one. Do you know you’re just now a man in some tribes? and in Thailand you won’t be an adult until you’re 55? People change with the passing of time; we become seasoned and more flavorful.

All hope is not gone, all chances are not lost, all change is not over until that biggest change of all, the final one. You are in the midst of a process, not the beginning and certainly not the end or near it. You will not be bent nor broken like the young sapling and you are on your way to becoming mighty like the oak. You stand strong NOW in a way that celebrated youth can’t even fathom. [Er

So there! 🙂

Choices. Life is about choices. Not all within our control, certainly, but many of them are. Choose to build the sandcastle, choose to become less of a rock. (Truth is, I know full well it’s easier saidthan done, but still, it’s worth a reminder.) Thanks for allowing your diary to become more personal, more open. I’ve enjoyed reading these inner thoughts.

Sandcastles are made of rocks that were too much cried upon. My dad and I mostly dodged the rain, going to Hartsville today. We kept seeing cars in opposite lanes with their lights still on, but we didn’t get drizzled on until we got back to Rock Hill. It was a fun time out with the old man…

RYN: nah! lol I always think the best age to be is whatever age I am at the time! But mine seems an extended youth….I jump up and down repeating, “But I’m almost 40!” so someone will take me seriously and stop calling me a kid…..so far, it hasn’t worked!

It seems you have been building a bridge to that island recently, Oswego, and giving us a glimpse into your ‘fortress’ with these more personal entries. I like what I see, thanks for sharing it. 🙂

Like Osprey says: You have a choice.. Sitting in that tower, you are dry and safe and unconquerable. You are scared to go out, but if you dared to open up the door, sure many would want to come in. Oswego, my friend, take care. Have a nice week ahead

I’ve been sitting with your words for sometime now…unsure what to say…trying to decide if physical alone-ness is worse than alone-ness felt in a crowded room. I think, perhaps, it is. Fortresses may keep us safe, but they also keep us alone. We survive, but what is our cost? Ha! I am one to talk. Watching life is much than participating, but there is always a feeling of something missing

Deleted the wrong word above…should be “much easier than participating.” But you probably would have figured that out – just the perfectionist in me rearing her head. My best to you as you re-examine your life’s choices. I think it good to remember that the journey is not yet ended. You might want to keep your eyes on the journey, not the destination.

I always did love that song. The same storm blew our way yesterday p.m. Wonderful. Out on the porch in rockers, getting misted cool by wonderful gusts of rain….!

I can’t say how I am moved by your entry. Thank you to have known how to evoke so perfectly the peace, the sweetness and the loneliness of a life which is your, but, also, mine.

so far, THE STEVEN MILLER BAND and JEWEL have been helping me out with college thus far. LIKE A BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATER, has always made me want to be a better person that to be seems so insatiable. the only song i can actually see myself is TRAIN’s, DROPS OF JUPITER. “so tell me, did you fall for a shooting star, one with that permament scar… and did you miss me while you looking….. [s

“so tell me, did you fall for a shooting star, one with that permament scar… and did you miss me while you looking for yourself out there.” i wanna tell everyone about everything, and i am sure that theres one person who is more excited to hear about my experiences than i am about telling them. i dont miss my family, i am sadden that they cant watch me look for myself out there. too bad, huh

The essence of a fortress is fear…of…what? Attack? Pain? Judgment? The truth? The lies? The uncertainties? The possibilities? Fortresses cast long shadows but it takes light to create shadows. It’s always worth the risk to step into the light, to let the light illuminate us. We are always stronger than we believe ourselves to be.

I am always most touched by “The Dangling Conversation.” In my cd player I usually keep five discs: S&G Greatest hits, Elvis: Greatest Hits, CSN&Y: So Far, Beatles: One, and Bob Seger: Greatest Hits. And that’s basically the rotation that I stick to when I just want to hear something good, reliable, comforting. I have about 750 CD’s and those are the five that get played. *shrugs* [Jude

I know the words to every single song you’ve mentioned. I completely understand the feelings, as well 🙂

I was so very alone for a long period in my life, protected. I had to work so hard to understand why I kept myself apart, kept love at a distance.I know. So many Simon & Garfunkle songs touched me deeply, still strike “ancient” chords of memory.The Graduate:yes, plastics, wink. It’s as if it was the first film I ever “understood,” related to…I’m glad you share here with an open heart. [Dream Sk

Those Simon and Garfunkel songs remain a part of me, also

Pain in life, I know about that; joy is the other truth, you know–we are not so fragile to need to avoid the risk. I have my faults, my losses, my failures and they are just that…traits not who we are as people–that’s my thought on it. I had an big insight lately: Bhuddist’s beginner’s mind is like being “born again” in J-C tradition: and we can be born again moment to moment. Like you so.

Well said, my friend!

“Hello,Darkness,my old friend. I’ve come to talk with you again”…The Sound of Silence. S&G. I love the melody to that song.RYN. I feel deeply humbled to be the recipient of those thoughts you left for me when commenting on my entries. From you, those words are pure gold. I highly value your opinions and admire your strength & depth of perception. 1 question. How old do you feel in your mind?Cont

When you think of yourself,within yourself? I still seem to be in my twenties when I open this little envelope of self. I feel amazement when I overhear that generation talking among themselves and I think,”If the only knew how those perceptions will change in 20 years.” I feel warm inside,realizing, I made it through all that madness and remain fairly sane. I have never felt my age in my thoughts

Oswego my friend you really opened the floodgates with that song. That was myself also, God I built walls around me. I remember hearing that, and Karen Carpenter’s “Good Bye to Love” and getting so depressed. But, at that age I did not dwell or try to analize too much and thankfully was able to get over it!

Yes my friend, the rock feels pain! Simon and Garfunkel have always been one of my favorites! The paragraph about your piles of books touches me because you express so well what I experience also, knowing they are there, and that there is so much wisdom in them to be explored, so much pleasure… I am glad I came here tonight. It’s so relaxing to read your beautiful entries. I longed to thi

of other things than worries of yesterday. Thank you my friend,