Dream Weaver…
Anybody who knows me knows I have a very vivid dreams that I usually remember. Some freak me out, some are just fun, other’s really confusing. Last nights dreams left me sad and happy at the same time. Every time I fell back to sleep last night I dreamed about the same two kids. A boy and a girl, blond curls, blue eyes. I am not sure what they looked like, but they were mine. I am not sure the age, but I was seriously trying to get to them. I knew in my dream I was supposed to save them, and be their mother. It was crazy. They were happy and giggling but at the same time running and abandoned. I felt such a strong need to save them but had no clue how. It seemed like such a fight to get to them. Maybe that is how I feel right now. It is such a fight to get to my children. I don’t even know if they are born yet, but I have such a strong need to get to them. I don’t know where it comes from sometimes. I will go a good long time, and just slightly think about the family I want to have, but then some nights it hits me over, and over and over.
Leaving the City of Regret
I had not really planned on taking a trip this time of year, and
yet I found myself packing rather hurriedly. This trip was
going to be unpleasant, and I knew in advance that no real good
would come of it. I’m talking about my annual "Guilt Trip."
I got tickets to fly there on Wish I Had airlines.
It was an extremely short flight.
I got my baggage, which I could not check. I chose to carry it
myself all the way. It was weighted down with a thousand
memories of what might have been.
No one greeted me as I entered the terminal to the Regret City
International Airport. I say international because people from
all over the world come to this dismal town.
As I checked into the Last Resort Hotel, I noticed that they
would be hosting the year’s most important event, the Annual
Pity Party. I wasn’t going to miss that great social occasion.
Many of the town’s leading citizens would be there.
<br s
tyle=”color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-family: ‘lucida grande’, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px;” />
First, there would be the Done family, you know,
Should Have,
Would Have
and Could Have.
Then came the I Had family.
You probably know ol’ Wish and his clan.
Of course, the Opportunities would be present, Missed and Lost.
The biggest family would be the Yesterday’s. There are far too
many of them to count, but each one would have a very sad story
to share.
Then Shattered Dreams would surely make an appearance. And It’s
Their Fault would regale us with stories (excuses) about how
things had failed in his life, and each story would be loudly
applauded by Don’t Blame Me and I Couldn’t Help It.
Well, to make a long story short, I went to this depressing
party knowing that there would be no real benefit in doing so.
And, as usual, I became very depressed.
But as I thought about all of the stories of failures brought
back from the past, it occurred to me that all of this trip and
<span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-family: 'lucida grande’, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px;”>subsequent "pity party" could be cancelled by ME!
I started to truly realize that I did not have to be there.
I didn’t have to be depressed. One thing kept going through my
mind, I CAN’T CHANGE YESTERDAY, BUT I DO HAVE THE POWER TO MAKE
TODAY A WONDERFUL DAY.
I can be happy, joyous, fulfilled, encouraged, as well as
encouraging. Knowing this, I left the City of Regret
immediately and left no forwarding address.
Am I sorry for mistakes I’ve made in the past? YES!
But there is no physical way to undo them.
So, if you’re planning a trip back to the City of Regret, please
cancel all your reservations now.
Instead, take a trip to a place called, Starting Again. I liked
it so much that I have now taken up permanent residence there.
My neighbors, the I Forgive Myselfs and the New Starts are so
very helpful. By the way, you don’t have to carry around heavy
baggage because the load is lifted from your shoulders upon arrival.
God bless you in finding this great town. If you can find it,
it’s in your own heart.<br style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;line-height: 19.5px;” />
Please look me up. I live on I Can Do It street.
~by Larry Harp~