Defeated…hurt

This entry is just favorites only…I don’t want it all out in the open but I was going through my favorites and I have John’s friend on my favorites and I read John’s note.

“Damn man 3 entries in less than a week? your doing better than me but anywayz guess who the hell called me again last night!? R*****! And truth be told damn man I miss her like crazy!”

Maybe he did realize that I was a flighty and selfish person and not just 2 minutes before I read that I left him a note telling him that I still loved him. Maybe what we had isn’t strong enough. I have tears in my eyes. The ones of defeat…hurt. I want to so bad pick up the phone and call him but what the hell is the use? He misses her…not me.

I am going out for a drive to maybe clear my head.

-A*