2009 has turned out to be a FUCKING BITCHIN year!!

So please tell me, what the hell else can go wrong? Did I do something to piss of the Spiritual Realm? I know I can be a bitch but damn, shits coming back at me times 3.

The first shitty thing that happened to my family is I was injured at work at the beginning of the year. It’s coming up on a year since I was injured. The initial injury date is February 4, 2009. Still nothing has gone on with trying to get it fixed. I called my lawyer crying the other morning…to more specific it was Thursday at 12:30AM. He said that my case has been sent to Albany so it is definitely going to take at least 6 month before I could hear something back. So everything is on hold. I can’t get my nerve conduction tests and I get 0 dollars. So we only have 1 income, and I’m sorry $1,600 a month [roughly] isn’t enough for a family of 4. And 2 of the 4 are still in diapers, and the diapers cost $16.97 A BOX, so times that by 2 every other week. [Spare me the potty training speeches…we’re trying with little success.]

The second shitty thing that happened to my family this year is we were evicted from our apartment. Granted, I’m happy we were because our rent was going to go up to $710 a month, for a 2 bedroom, 1 bath apartment. We hated it, but that landed us right back living with Pats mom. I love my mother-in-law to death, but we just can not live together. Felonies would be committed. I have no idea how we lived together for a month and a half without killing each other and she has the same size apartment that we had. Thankfully we’re “poor enough” to get accepted into Brookside. However, the place is like a prison than an apartment complex. Every apartment has to look the same, so god forbid you have a sign on your dog, for example, a sign that say room shoes at the door, or you’ll get a write up. God forbid your 2 year olds act like 2 year olds or you’ll get a write up. So far we’ve had 3 because the kids are being just that, kids. They’re “too loud.” God forbid you do more than 1 load of laundry a week, because you might end up creating “irregular amount of lint in the lint trap.” So yeah…what a great move.

Now the third shitty thing that happened to my family this year happened on Thursday, December 3, 2009. The same Thursday I was talking about when I called my lawyer at 12:30AM. Our truck was repossessed. As you all know we had a 2004 GMC Enovy. Well thanks to the interest rate being ridiculous we couldn’t make the monthly payments of $392.22. [If you didn’t know, seeing Pat credit is shot and when we went and got the truck the house had already been foreclosed on. That shot the interest rate up to 24%. Good fun huh?] The people that came and got the truck called me at 11 at night wanting to speak to Pat. At that time Pat is at work, which I told them. They knew when he worked and they wanted to know when he got home. I, being half asleep, told them midnight. I called Pat at work and told him what had happened. When he got home that night, they had followed right behind him and was here as he got home. The stayed behind the truck so Pat could clean it out. Shit, we had $300 dollars worth of car seats in the truck. Then they took it. Pat and I stood in the door way and watched them as they drove it out of here to, I’m assuming, meet up with a flat bed truck. I’ve taken it really hard. I cried myself to sleep that night. I feel awful for what I said to Pat about it. I blamed him for everything. Now to see that the truck is now gone, which will look so GREAT on his credit report, makes me feel like a failure as a wife. I also feel like a failure as a mother. I can’t afford to keep a reliable vehicle for my children. Well, I can’t afford to keep anything nice for my kids. We have broken furniture [thanks to the twins taking the cushions off and jumping on it when no one is looking], we are borrowing Pats mothers kitchen table, and half of it doesn’t come up because the mechanism that hold the leaf up doesn’t work. One of the chairs are broken. They took our washer and dryer…however, Pat and I went to a different place and leased a washer and dryer. Not new, but it’s a washer and dryer.

So yeah that’s what going on right now. I’m so stressed out that I have this constant headache in the front of my head right above my eyes, and in the back of my head. Sometimes it’s not so bad and I can deal with it, but other times I can’t even think straight and Vicodain SOMETIMES works. I did manage to get the kids’ small bit of Christmas gifts off of layaway. Saturday I was so depressed, I couldn’t talk to anyone without bawling my eyes out. I barely spoke at all if I wasn’t talking on the phone to try and find a way to get groceries in this place. My favorite show was having a marathon [The Golden Girls] Saturday and I normally laugh my ass off even if I’ve seen that episode a million times, and I barely smiled. We were suppose to go to this Buy Here-Pay Here place this past Friday and we couldn’t. With the down payment, it would have left us with $65. [Which is my fault seeing I kind of over did it seeing I was pissed off at Pat for coming home so much this month, which slims the pay check even more.] Anyways, this place has 2 minivans, and we could have payed $399 down and had a payment of almost $100 dollars CHEAPER than what we were paying for the truck. Pat can’t take out another loan from his 401K until the end of January seeing he has to wait 3 months from the first loans pay off date to take out another one. His mother so nicely told us she still has $1,200 dollars left from the $3,900 she was SUPPOSE to give back to her sister [she never did]. We’ve asked and asked to borrow just the $400 dollars and she’d get it back when we got his loan and we get this song and dance. “No, I have to save it because I have to try and figure out how to get the $3,900 back to my sister.” Her sister is LOADED, so it’s not like she’s in dire need of it. Plus the sister hasn’t even called for Ellen to pay it back. But whatever. Then there is my ever loving mother. Now, my mom had the same thing happen to her truck last month, however she has a “back up car” that she kind of took from Dan. Long story. Anyways, if she needed to go anywhere other than Cdga. she’d call me and ask me to take her. No problem, she’s my mom and I don’t mind. Now the shoes are on my feet, and I get a big fuck you Amanda. Friday was Pats, my mom’s and my MIL company Christmas party at the bowling alley [they all work at the same place], and my mom wanted us all to go so she could “show off her grandkids” and when this all happened she said we’d figure out something. We came to the conclusion that we’d make 2 trips. Friday came, I tried calling her 2 times and no answer. I called JJ and she said that my mom was in the shower. Told JJ to have her call me when she was done. My mother finally decided to call me as she was going into the bowling alley. I was like what the fuck? She said that she didn’t know what time a co-worker of hers was goingto be there and when she found out that this co-worker was going to be there at 12:30 she decided to go with her and spend the day with her than come get us. Plus she told me that she had to go grocery shopping. I mentioned that I too had to do the same. The answer I got: “I thought John was going to take you?” [John works with Pat and he offered Friday, the day that my mom came and got me, well the only day she’s came and got me, to come and get us to do shopping. But I had already made plans with my mom.] She offer to come and get me, she just went on her loving way. I called her at 6 that night to get her voicemail. I didn’t leave a message. I called her the next morning and she did pick up. I asked if she had fun and she told me it was alright and that they stayed until 3 that afternoon. [I hope they had a fucking great time!] I asked her if she was coming into Cdga. that day, and she asked why. I asked her if she was if she’d come and get me so I could get some food in the house. I got this song and dance: “Well I want to go to Wal Mart, but I don’t know when I’ll be out there. Why don’t you have Eric do it?” Eric is a mutual friend of mine and Pats and he drive truck. He’s barely home to begin with. I told her fine, that I’d find my own way and I was doing talking to her. I hung up before she told me bye. Pat did call Eric and he came and got Pat yesterday to get groceries. I am so thankful for him. He had to work yesterday, and he had been up since 3am and he still came and got Pat after her was done working. I posted on my myspace how we got food thanks to a great friend and my mother left me a status comment today saying this: “glad to see you got groceries…love you.” Yeah, no thanks to you. [She never even called to let me know if she was or wasn’t coming out this way or not.] So, when we get the new vehicle [we’re looking at January 15 before we can do anything], we are not doing favors for people anymore. [Eric yes seeing he’s help a lot just by doing so little.] My mother can find her own way to get my brother, unless he calls me first. She can also find her own way to any where. She can drive her precious car because I’ll be “too busy” or “running late”. I put those in quotations because that is what my mother told me Friday. She was too busy cleaning the house to answer the phone, when normally she’ll be vacuuming WHILE ON THE PHONE WITH ME. And running late? Please. She wasn’t thrilled to go to party to begin with. I had to cancel my Ortho. appointment because it’s a half hour away from where I live and my mom can’t take me because she doesn’t have snow tires yet. We’ve had a few flurries, but nothing to stick to the ground. [I tried moving to the Ortho. in my city and all 5 of the doctors said no. The receptionist didn’t have a reason why for me seeing the doctors don’t have to give one to her. So now I don’t know what to do. Granted, it’s the same run around every time I go seeing no can do anything with me thanks to this damn appeal.] Thankfully, I talked to my Heidi-Mom and she said that she’d take me to my Friday appointment with Dr. Manfred. Now the only thing I have to find a ride for is my WIC appointment on the 23rd. I REFUSE to call and ask my mother seeing this is what I get. Pat had to walk to work today seeing the people he was getting a ride with have today off. I asked him if he wanted me to call my mom and he said that he’d rather walk than listen to her rag on me.

Well I think I’m going to end this entry now. My little hellions broke the closet doors in there room so I have to go fix them and the disaster area they call a bedroom. Until next time…toodles.

♥ Amanda

Amanda Keyser

QuitMeter Counter courtesy of http://www.quitmeter.com.

<img src="http://davf.daisypath.com/z4xLm5.png&quot; width="400" height=”80″ border=”0″ alt=”Daisypath Anniversary tickers” />

.The Angel.