Baby Gravy

Politics
“I’m getting really sick of politics,” Meg declared today on our way to dinner. “It seems all we do is watch political shows in our free time.”
Feeling somewhat responsible, since I made her read my last blog post about the president debate, I asked her what we should watch on TV.
“You don’t like Ancient Aliens,” she said. It took me a moment to realize she was joking. “And those shows about Bible Codes,” she added.
She’s right though—I’ve been focused on the presidential race and politics more than usual the last few months. I’ve taken to recording and watching Rachel Maddow, The Daily Show, Colbert, listening to NPR, reading political blogs, and writing political posts.
So, in the spirit of not writing about politics for once, I present a post about semen.
Synonyms
“I wonder how many names there are for semen?” I asked Meg on our ride home the other day.
“Probably lots,” she said.
I pulled out my iPhone and, with a fair amount of trepidation, entered “semen synonym” into the Google machine. Here are some of my findings.
sow, seed, season, semen, seminary, baby maker, baby batter, baby gravy, climax, come, cum, cream, funk, gisim, gyt, ick, jism, jit, jiz, jizz, liquid marble, load, love drops, love fluid, love jelly, love juice, man-milk, juice of life, man mustard, mayonnaise, milky way, nectar, nut, penis milk, potato soup, pearl jam, penis pudding, protein frappe’, quaq, quim, salt water, salty tea, seed, shoot our wad, slime, sperm, seminal fluid, spew, sploit, splunk, spooge, spoogie, spuge, spunk, soap scum, sugar, tadpoles, wad, wadd, warm, yuck
My favorite is “baby gravy.”
You’re Not…
While researching the above important matter, Meg squinted at my screen. “What are you doing?”
“Making a list,” I said vaguely.
“Yes?”
“Making a list of… errr… semen synonyms.”
She wrinkled her nose. “You’re not going to post that on your blog, are you?”