structure

My life could use some.

I’m listless. I need more concrete things to do at work, otherwise nothing ever gets done at all.

I should probably smoke weed less frequently – I tend to get the munchies and overeat. I’ve been tracking my calories (and nutrients in general) using one of those online calorie-count sites, and it’s been great in terms of maintaining accountability. Really makes it obvious how I’ve managed to gain 4-5 lbs/year in the past 2 years. I’ve been hitting the gym more often too – at least 3 times a week, which is a new record for me. The past 2 weeks have been a disaster, unfortunately, and I’m having a difficult time getting back on track. I know it’s because I’ve quit smoking (cigarettes). Last time I quit, I gained like 15 lbs     Trying hard to avoid a repeat of that.

What else? 

J was here a few weeks ago. Before he came we had the second worst fight of our relationship. I don’t know if we’ve moved past it completely, but his stay was good. And long freakin’ overdue. A 4 month separation is just unacceptable to me. That damn paper he nearly killed himself working on better get accepted (we’re still waiting to hear back from the journal), otherwise a reviewer or two just might wind up dead (err, kidding).  I’m about to purchase tickets to visit him at the end of the month. 

Last weekend I met up with a college friend in Chicago to go see a Russian concert. It was a great trip. I love Chicago! It’s totally a cleaner, newer, less-crowded version of NYC. Well, ok, it’s also quite a bit smaller and probably has less going on. But definitely one of my favorite US cities. My friend’s step-dad works for Ramada and gets ridiculous discounts on hotels anywhere in the world. So we got to stay right in downtown Chicago for $50/night (I think the regular price for our room is ~$290/night). It was awesome. We were right on the river and had a gorgeous view of the city. 

I should travel more. Except I feel guilty missing work. But work is horribly un-fulfilling at the moment. And that’s partly my fault. I need to own my projects better, put more of myself into them. But it’s hard to do when nothing ever fucking works like it’s supposed to for no god-damn reason at all. Sigh. That’s a career in science for you though, or the ugly side of it, anyway.