decisions, decisions

My Phd supervisor said something today that kind of blew my mind..and pissed me off.  We were having a conversation about heritable disorders such as Tay-Sach’s and the hypothetical scenario where he was a disease carrier and found out his partner was a carrier also (so a 25% change their offspring would have the disease). He said he would – and I quote – find someone else to love at that point. I mean, am I crazy or is that a ridiculously cold and callous thing to just toss out there? I understand having biological children is very important to some people, but this fucker basically missed the first 12 years of his children’s lives, opting to focus on his career instead. And yet the possibility of not being able to pass on his genetic material is enough incentive for him to dump the love of his life, just like that? No consideration given to adoption? What about pre-implantation genetic diagnosis (he’s a physician, he knows about this shit). It just bothers me. 

It looks like the move to Philly just might happen. I’m actually meeting with my program coordinator to discuss my options. Honestly, I haven’t a clue what I’m doing yet. I desperately want to wind up closer to J, but we still have no idea where he’s going to be next year so it’s a bit of a moving target. I like the idea of moving back to the East Coast in general. On the other hand, I question my decision to join this lab all the time, and this move could just be my out. Then again, I’d have to start my Phd from scratch two years in. Not that a move wouldn’t set me back by at least a year anyway. At least I can always go back if I decide to move and hate it or if J winds up closer to STL. 

We’ll see.