Petunia, one of the ducks you love
Hello!
Well I just thought I would check in. I don’t have much to say today. My husband has been super sick the last week and now I’ve got it too. But it’s okay! Michael and I are working together really well. The baby has been coughing and sneezing all day so I fully expect a sick baby tomorrow. I hope I’m better because it will really suck if we’re both super sick because Michael has a busy week.
It’s definitely times like these that I wish I had some family support.
But I haven’t been really sad. I’ve definitely been feeling low motivation, but I think that’s just coming from the general stress of dealing with sickness.
A few days ago I couldn’t sleep and I stayed up all night writing. I wrote a really interesting piece, kind of a memoir. I let Michael read it and he really liked it. He said it would be a good forward to the book I hope to write one day.
It really doesn’t help that the weather has just been insane. I feel like it’s been cloudy and raining since Christmas! Mama needs sunshine, people! I had been looking forward for a month to my friend Annie’s birthday party, and I had to cancel last minute because a wild winter storm came through. It’s been so weirdly cold and rainy here in California for so long! We usually get like 3 weeks of winter and it’s been a real one, folks.
My son has started waving! It’s so adorable. God I love him so much. I didn’t know love like that existed. We’ve been talking a lot about possibly homeschooling. I never thought I would ever even consider homeschooling, but right now I’m feeling hard pressed to find any reasons for sending my child to a public school. There’s just so much scary shit! Guns, porn, drugs, kids getting bullied literally to death…
I was thinking about how I want to take my son all over the world and what a pain in the ass that will be if he’s in school all day 5 days a week. I just wish there was something kind of in-between homeschooling and traditional school. Something 3 or 4 days a week, that’s much less regimented, more hands on, more outside. My high school, no bullshit, was designed by a company that also designed prisons in the 70s. Several of our classrooms didn’t even have windows. I don’t know… It just doesn’t feel right anymore. I see the pure joy in my son’s face, the sparkle in his eyes, and I just don’t want the system to rob him from that. But I also don’t want him to live a sheltered life. There has to be an answer. I’m going to start taking him to different parks where different homeschool groups meet and just start talking to everyone. Hopefully I can find some kind of collective of like-minded people.
I want to take him to Greece to learn about greek mythology. I want to take him to Japan and Germany to learn about the world wars. I want to take him to Carnival. I want to pick seashells with him in Peru. I want to snorkel with him to learn about sea life. I want to go on long road trips back and forth from here to New York to teach him about real American history.
Thankfully there’s time, so I just have to start looking and asking around immediately.
In other news, my son has a little fleet of rubber duckies he’s taken a bath with every night since he was born. They’re slowly acquiring names and personalities. The first one was Sampson, the Palm Springs duck, because he has on a paper hat and a casual button down with palm trees on it. His song goes “Sampson, the palm springs duck! Nobody knooooows where Sampson gooooooes, when you get out of the bath!” Next there’s Sarge. Sarge got his name because he wears a green beret and carries a pouch. I thought he was an army guy but it turns out he’s a golfer. His song goes “Sarge, he’s large and in charge, got out of the army, and now he plays golf!” And now there’s Petunia. She’s a white duck with little hearts all over. Her song goes, “Petunia, Petunia, one of the ducks you love! Petunia, Petunia, lots of luck and love!” Haha they’re all so dang cute.