Gas expensive? Consider this!

 

So, you think a gallon of gas is expensive? Take a look at the price for these fluids.
 
Lipton Ice Tea – 16 oz $1.19……. $ 9.52 per gallon
Ocean Spray – 16 oz $1.25 …….. $10.00 per gallon
Gatorade – 20 oz $1.59 ………….. $10.17 per gallon
Diet Snapple – 16 oz $1.29 …….. $10.32 per gallon
Evian water – 9 oz for $1.49 ……. $21.19 per gallon
Whiteout – 7 oz $1.39 ……………. $25.42 per gallon
Brake Fluid – 12 oz $3.15 ………. $33.60 per gallon
Scope – 1.5 oz $0.99 ……………… $84.48 per gallon
Pepto Bismol – 4 oz $3.85 ………. $123.20 per gallon
Vick’s Nyquil – 6 oz $8.35 ………. $178.13 per gallon
Semen – 1oz $1,306.87 …………. $167,279 per gallon*
 
 

*Semen or more correctly, seminal fluid, may be the most expensive fluid known to man. A recent study considered the following factors in arriving at the cost:
 
“The average human male can produce approximately 0.4 ml of seminal plasma each day or a rough approximation of 14 gallons over his lifetime. How much of that actually successfully makes it to a vagina somewhere is anyone’s guess. However, for this study we will presume approximately 14% or 2 gallons.”
 
“To arrive at the cost per gallon of semen, we estimated the total “coupling costs” expended (listed below) and divided that number by 2 (the presumed number of gallons successfully arriving in a vagina.)  This cost is primarily borne by the male and may be higher or lower than indicated as many males spend a lot more for a lot less, and are generally considered unreliable in their reporting!” – Resource, the Internet, as researched by Nunzio.
 
Coupling Costs:
 

  • Dating or,
  • Hunting the opposite sex
  • Dinners
  • Drinks
  • Entertainment expenses
  • Travel
  • Missed opportunities
  • Target evasive maneuvers
  • DWI
  • Bail
  • The "nos"
  • Hookers
  • Replacement activities (live)
  • Replacement activities, i.e. tapes, magazine subscriptions
  • Spice Channel
  • Marriage
  • Divorce
  • Child support
  • Kid’s college education
  • Alimony
  • Viagra (so we can repeat the process)

    (Caution – Per ounce price tends to increase with age.)

    
So, the next time you’re at the pump, be glad your car doesn’t run on water, Scope or, God forbid, seminal fluid!
 
 

 
 

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June 30, 2008

ROFLMOA!!!

June 30, 2008

LOL Oh dear god, only you. 🙂

Yes, exactly….ONLY YOU! Can’t help but love you for it!

June 30, 2008

Bwahahahaha!!! How come it seems like a GALLON sometimes when you’re swallowing? Just sayin’….

June 30, 2008

That girl needs to get a tan, she is looking a little pasty 🙂 If semen is so expensive, why is so much being wasted in the shower? Just asking!!! LOL

June 30, 2008

“Wasted in the shower?” WASTED? That’s not wasted. That is a very important procedure all males should go through to avoid the little understood condition known as *DSBU! Most males do not realize they are carriers of *DSBU until the day AFTER they have been around alcohol and pussy, when they discover they did (or said) some REALLY stupid stuff the night before. Yes,“Shower Spillage” is a very necessary step in curing, or reducing the risk of, *DSBU! “Wasted,” indeed! (*Deadly Seminal Build Up!) 😉

June 30, 2008

And don’t forget the $20 a pill for Levitra if that’s necessary too! My poor husband…he said Sunday he can no longer justify driving into town for a $1.50 Sunday newspaper. What a state the world is in!!

June 30, 2008

You’re ahead of me… I see Viagra there now. LOL. But $20 a pop! Jeez… and my husband doesn’t GENERATE any giz.

June 30, 2008

lol 🙂

June 30, 2008

Good save, Nunzio. I am worth every penny of $20 a pop

June 30, 2008

that is why I dont drive,… I rather spend my money on better things like EVIAN water

RYN: No, you are not wrong. Some lessons take a long time to learn. Thanks for your words…again…I always always treasure them…and take them into my life and heart.

July 2, 2008

RYN – thank you. Nice to see you agai…….thought you’d drifted off to another diary or blog.

July 2, 2008

Nothing is wasted if it keeps the “equipment” running!

RYNRMNRYN….etc… Of course! *wonders what day July 11 falls on, and wonders further if there is a tradition being born*

July 3, 2008

haha! hilarious. btw, that girl in the bottom picture has a wierd looking snatch..! i’m just saying. me thinks she needs plastic surgery — or has she already?

July 3, 2008

To MG: ^ That girl in the bottom picture is the “after surgery” picture of a long distance trucker out of Des Moines named Bubba!

July 7, 2008

Down boy down!!!

LOL MG and the note from Nunzio to MG! I thought the same thing! Meaty! RYN: Why, yes. Yes indeed!

July 8, 2008

You know I fantasize about you, Nunzio.

July 8, 2008

Why do you shoot me down just when I’m getting wound up? *harrumph* You know you want me.

July 9, 2008

You’ve got a hard on now, don’t you?

July 9, 2008

Come over hear and whisper that baby talk into my ear, Buster. I’ll show you who needs some ass rubs.

July 9, 2008
July 11, 2008

These notes are as funny as this entry. Stole you from bbtl.

July 11, 2008

Also, I agree with Mountain Girl…that’s one odd looking kitty.

RYN: I peeked at the second link last night. This is all part of me working out my fear issues surrounding porn, too…that I *do* know…want to de-mystify it somehow…

July 11, 2008

Just the thought of semen filling an empty milk gallon makes me want to hurl. 🙂

July 13, 2008

ryn- possibly your right but once someones dead its too little too late and the other person wont care anymore anyway. so whats the point?

RYN: You know what? You rock! 😀 Your note made me laugh out loud at my desk first thing monday morning. Thanks – you maniac!

July 14, 2008

RYN: WOW. *head explodes* That’s pretty telling. I’ma have to think on that one. WOW.

July 14, 2008

ryna- expressing grief is all well and good but to out and out lie is something else entirely i think

LMAO … aren’t you guys generous .. just giving it away like that :o)

July 16, 2008

LOLOLOL – OMG this is hysterical!! and the NOTES – all so fabulous!! thanks for the giggle. really. pucker up big boy and let me thank you properly……. oh good – I’m not the only one who thought that snatch looked .. I dunno – substantial?

July 16, 2008

How about you lick my ASS!?????

July 18, 2008

My PLEASURE! ^ *wiggles eyebrows*

July 18, 2008

thank you dear friend.

July 18, 2008

ryn: ~gasp~ you mean…..I can ORDER AHEAD??!! oh please TELL me there is delivery!! because hell yeah.. I’d like to sample the entire menu please. = )

July 29, 2008

I’m really pissy and unenlightened these days, Babycakes. I’m tempted to say “IT’S NEVER GOING TO BE THE WAY IT WAS AGAIN” so BLAH BLAH BLAH, NUNZIO. But I won’t. Say it. I won’t. Sometimes, Dearling, I just GOTTA catastrophize!!!!!!! I’m Catholic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RYN: Silly! Those aren’t gladiator sandals! 😀

July 29, 2008

And your point would be WHAT exactly? Yes… melikes to long. I’ve spent my whole damn life longing — longing was my IMPRINTING — why on earth should I stop now? LOL. Besides… I beseech thee to recognize my progress. I don’t long nearly as much as I used to. Nor for as long.

July 29, 2008

Now get ovah here because I’ve got something for you to clean up!

RYN: Oh, for the love of!!!! *slaps your face affectionately*

RYN: Baby, the force of my affection should be leaving a nice red mark and a sweet warm glow after. Enjoy! See, I’M Mediterranean meself! Greek, I am. Spartan, actually!

August 1, 2008

Nunzio…you are a pig (re my daughter). Committed to me my ass. Chah.

August 1, 2008

NO.

August 4, 2008

This one got my attention! You forgot my Redbull….which I drink daily at $2.99 for 8.3 oz. If I could quit smoking and drinking redbull I could afford to stay home and NOT work! Miss ya!

August 4, 2008

RYN: I hate you. (lol) Oh, but he would. I could GET HIM TO. Tee hee. Not every man has an iron will like YOU!!!!!

August 4, 2008

RYN: Oh sweetness… and we love you for it.

August 5, 2008

Excellent list of associated costs. To add a bit more even, I’d suggest the insertion of the cost for an “affair” between marriage and divorce. I mean…really…it’s tough to turn away from the hotties one may meet at the gas pump, eh? Ryn: I would certainly not be inclined to turn down an angel. Just not too sure that is one of their hangouts.

August 5, 2008

RYN: lol. Sure does.

August 5, 2008

YES. I WANT PICTURES OF YOUR PINK PORK. SEND THEM NOW.

August 6, 2008

RYN: I didn’t say I wouldn’t open it. I’d just look over my shoulder at work first. 😉

August 6, 2008

RYN: Why, yes, Nunzio. Yes it is tiring being me. Told you!!!!!

August 6, 2008

^^laughs at overachiever.

August 8, 2008

“Titties”???? You’re a pig. A dirty, filthy farm animal. Good for almost nothing. ALMOST. *roughly takes handful of salt and pepper hair*

August 8, 2008

Dawg. *smootch*

August 11, 2008

Only if you do it for me too!

August 12, 2008

oh how i miss your entries 🙂 write more! ryn: muffle away man, muffle away!

August 12, 2008

ryn: Glad it makes things easier. It was starting to drive me crazy..~laughing~ I hope you’ve been well.

August 12, 2008

ryn: LMAO!! Nunzio! bless you! seriously that is very cool of you to leave me such a thorough note and with so many informational links!!! i will have so much to look forward to and read 😉 *grin* just made my day. thank you

August 13, 2008

ryn: You are most welcome, I’m glad you enjoyed the video. I found it very inspiring, I only wish I had watched it sooner. Zen Habits has been in my feed reader for quite a while and it seemed like a good time to share.

August 13, 2008

ryn:The harm she is doing is assuming someone else’s–a very real girl’s–identity. In case you didn’t realize, that is a crime. Maybe you wouldn’t mind if someone took your private pictures and started saying they were you and wrote embarassing private things they were supposely doing all the while masked as you. Think about it. Let’s see…in her diary she uses a very young girl’s pictures as her own all the while writing about drug taking, frequent one-night stands, etc. Now let’s say someone finds those entries and sees the young girl and assumes she is really doing stuff like that. Like a potential employer, family friend, etc. Do I even have to explain how wrong this is to you? The fact that you would even question gives me pause.

August 13, 2008

ryn:I answer notes both on the ODer’s diary who posed them, but when they are related to an ongoing debate I like to present both sides to readers so they are included. That way they don’t only get half the story or have to try to click back and forth between diaries only to find one is faves only sometimes. I like to present, as much as possible, a balanced forum for stuff like this wherethere are clearly two trains of thought. I find the social commentary interesting and think most readers do too

i’m a stranger. i was reading charmingly neurotic’s latest entry and notes and feel compelled to tell you that i admired your kindness and that you gave your true opinion about the entry. the mob mentality that crops up from time to time in od and those who try to incite it, are part of the reason i stopped interacting and write and read only for myself now. for the record, i’ve left cn a few notes regarding the same subject in the past. this note would be unsigned but you don’t allow them. 🙂 hope you have a great rest of the day.

August 13, 2008

(Hmm, this is interesting, because your diary doesn’t allow notes, I’ll respond here. Hope you see it.) ===== RYN: (To: M_ _ ) Thank you for saying that as I felt I failed in achieving the goal of “state your truth but do it softly and with kindness,” in that note. Quieting the ego requires full-time vigilance Â… at least MINE does! 😉 Thank you again for your kind note. Best wishes,

the irony is that i checked to see if you left me a note because i wasn’t sure if you’d be ok with a note from a stranger. i forgot i was set to “no notes.” i kill myself sometimes. 🙂 the truth is, that while i did think your note was very decent to cn, it was your kindness about the diarist spotlighted in cn’s entry that i admired. i felt the same way. particularly, “WHAT HARM IS SHE DOING? And WHY on Earth would you feel it necessary to “Out” such a wounded soul?” i was surprised to see your note articulating how i felt. most people try to appease the writer and their notes reflect sheep mentality or downright nastiness. i think a person can disagree without being nasty and you did just that. thank You for the kind note. it’s been nice to brush fingertips. 🙂

August 13, 2008

RYN: (To: M_ _ ) Thanks for the additional very nice note and especially the “Brush fingertips” part. Woo, that gave me shivers and made my ho-ho feel all tingly. 😉

August 14, 2008

ha! she blocked me, too. i guess she can’t take the criticism…she really was mean this time, though. i mean, i guess i could understand outing some guy who is coming on to lots of women, but, heh, COME ON. she’s make it her job to “get” people just for the drama of it. she’s got some dillusions about her image,and she wants her diary to read “just so”. i remember once, i left her a reallygreat note about someone who was getting all over CN for just the same reasons. CN actually went into my note and REWROTE it so it had more information in it. like i said, she wants her diary to read “just so.” she’s got it all wrong, though, because as much as she can go on about doing the “right” thing, this site is about putting your creativity out there. if this broad chose to do a pretend diary so what? like there aren’t hundreds here. and CN can’t deny that she’s thrilled at the sharp contrast between the “girl” pics and the real person. oh, i was VERY confrontational. but you weren’t so much. i think she didn’t like the fact that you called her on answering her notes in her own diary. i’ll bet she deleted that note already. 😀

ryn: you made me laugh! 🙂

August 20, 2008

Actually I was in a fuzzy pink bathrobe and cheetah print furry slippers. But I was naked underneath! Does that win me lusting from you?

August 21, 2008

Funny. I thought you were basing the cost on how much someone would pay if they bought it from a sperm bank.

August 22, 2008

Thanks so much. I was talking to “M” today about the situation. She is in the same boat – being threatened with holding pay. This is helpful.

September 4, 2008

rare entries these days. i’d forgotten how you always managed to take a droll topic and spice it up with T&A. Well done!! 😉

September 11, 2008

If they had gas attendants like those two girls, I wouldn’t mind spending a little more for gas from them! 😉

November 22, 2008

LOL