Tired of living

 

My Mikey, I love you

∞ • π³ + 1

We just dropped Lola off at her house.  I didn’t want to go get her in the first place, because I knew what kind of day I was facing.  Then, just before leaving, it got worse.  I found out that Elisabeth emotionally blackmailed Alex and Juli.

She kissed Frankie’s brother Gilbert, and the kids walked in and saw it.  Apparently, both Elisabeth and Gil told the kids not to say anything to MH or they’d be mad at them.  Elisabeth told them, from what they say, that she would be angry with them and never come back down to see them.

YOU DON’T FUCKING DO THAT TO MY BABIES!!!!!!

She is so grounded.  I would spank her, even though she’s 15 years old, but if I started, at this point, I’d BEAT her, so….grounding will have to do.

Lola and I got into a fight.  She blames it all on me, but it wasn’t my fault.  She jumped in the car, barking orders about where we were going and what we were doing, as usual.  Well, this was the WRONG day to pull that shit with me.  You can either fucking ASK or you can FUCKING WALK!!!!!

Then, I wish I could’ve run her over, because as she got out of the car, she threw Malcolm up in my face again.  "The most important thing, I didn’t even do, and that’ll hurt Malcolm!"

Don’t use your child as a weapon against me, especially when NO mention of him was made before that, in regards to this particular errand.

I hate people, and I hope I drop dead.  I wish I wasn’t too chickenshit to commit suicide.  I want so badly to slice my arms up and bleed to death, but I can’t fathom dealing with the pain that would accompany it.  Who cares?  It’s only me.

I told Lola not to call me again.  She said she won’t.  She said if Mikey needed something, he could have it, but I couldn’t.  I find that deliciously funny, considering that when I go on my Mikey rants to her, she usually says HE won’t be getting anything from her.  Well, fuck her.  It doesn’t matter.

I am tired of living.

Oscar