The med thing has started again

She got her fucking Klonopin again.  Monday, we go to the doctor, and she’ll get her pain pills again.  

I’m not ready for this.  I don’t know if I can do it.  We’ve had our problems since she hasn’t had the pills, but at least she was clear-headed and able to form an intelligent sentence.  Now, she’s already cloggy again, and she can’t understand anything I say to her.  Fucking pills.  I hate them.

I’m thinking that the first time she overdoses on those goddamned narcotics, I hope she dies and then I kill myself.  I’m sorry for what it would do to anyone who really loves us, but I’m also sick as hell of this crazy, stupid shit.