Recalling this Mother’s Day

My Mikey, I love you

∞ • π³ + 1

I am so braindead I can hardly stand it, but insomnia seems to have me in its grips again.  The bugger!

Mother’s Day is a day to celebrate the state of motherhood.  We choose this one particular day to celebrate, when, in my humble opinion, every day should be cause to celebrate motherhood.

Mama worked for about four hours this morning, putting together a photo album for Memaw.  It is only half complete, but the main sections of it were in place, so Mama went ahead and gave it to Memaw.

As she looked through the photos, she made her way through each of her children.  Martha.  Smile.  Glenda.  Smile.  Shirley.  Smile.  Roy.  Smile.  Clyde.  Smile.  Mama. Smile.

Then she turned the page and came upon Uncle Ray.  For those who may not know it, my Uncle Ray has been dead for 20 1/2 years.  Upon seeing his face, Memaw turned her head downwards, covered her eyes, and issued a few almost-silent sobs.  She is not far gone enough to forget that her baby is gone.

My heart broke for my precious grandmother as she realized that on this day, when she had been so happy to see three of her daughters and some of her grandchildren, she was missing such a large part of her life, because her youngest child is no longer with us.

There were a lot of pictures of Ray on his pages.  It made me realize, yet again, the lasting effects each of us have on people.  Ray, Mama’s only younger sibling, died in 1985 in a freak electrical accident.  He filled everyone’s life with so much fun, and everyone misses him to this day.

After Memaw closed the album, I picked it up and started going through it.  When I came upon Ray’s pictures, I talked about how much my cousin Lance looks like Ray.  Lance is not Ray’s son, but he is Ray’s sister’s son, and it is not unheard of for a nephew to resemble his uncle.  Mama and I told My Mikey that everyone loved Ray so much.  He had such enthusiasm, such charm, and was so mischievous that he won everyone over…even when he was misbehaving, of which he did his fair share.

Memaw smiled again as we talked about these things.  I was so glad that we could bring a smile to her face.  Yes, she misses him.  Yes, she has an empty place in her life that could never be filled again.  But she is so lucky to remember her son with such love.  She is lucky that other people loved her son as much as they did.  And she is smart enough to realize this, even in the midphases of Alzheimer’s Disease.

I called Nanny later.  She was pleasant, yet again.  I hope this sudden change in attitude lasts with her.  It would be so nice to spend what time we have left together in peace.  I know she does not have a death warrant or anything.  Only God knows when Nanny’s (or any of our) time is up.  The likelihood of her lasting much longer in her own deteriorating state is not very great.  This, however, is why I do not trust in me for these matters.  I place my trust soundly in my Lord and Savior.

I am blessed to have these women, and I have a beautiful, wonderful mother of my own.  My daughter, Tiffany, is a model of strength, resilience, and internal fortitude the likes of which I have only seen in my mother.

Yes, the blessings have been laid on, and I am very grateful to God for them.  These are special years.

Love to everyone,

Jack