Maybe God is trying to tell us something

My Mikey, I love you

∞ • π³ + 1

In fact, I’m almost positive that he IS trying to tell us something.  I think I even know what it is….slow down, take your hands off the reins, and let Me handle it!

With all the things that have happened lately, we’ve both (My Mikey and I) thought of ending it via suicide.  That is not a good idea.  On one day, after they didn’t let me deposit my check into Mikey’s account, if I’d had a gun, I WOULD HAVE blown my brains out.  When we got home, a card from Tiffany was waiting for us.  In it were pictures of our grandchildren.  When I saw those beautiful babies, I couldn’t muster up anything but love and a strong will to keep living, to give them a chance, as well as us.

I really believe God is tired of dealing with our own forcefulness.  He seems to be saying, "Trust me or see what you get!"  So I’m trusting Him.  It’s too much for me to deal with alone.  The utilities keep getting disconnected over and over again.  Work keeps giving me maybe eight hours per week, if I’m lucky.  We are NOT getting our grandchildren, as we’ve been denied officially, now.  It’s too much for one human to handle…at least THIS human.  So I’m giving it to God.

We’ve been having bad issues regarding whether or not my spouse is addicted to pain medicines.  The other night, he fell against a door frame, but when he asked me to take him to the hospital, I refused.  That caused a HUGE fight, and it ended with his taking two Excedrin, which could cause him to bleed to death internally.  I prayed and went to sleep.

We’re somewhat okay.  Getting better, I hope.

Love,

Jack