Blue Birthday

I didn’t sleep well last night, because I was excited about today being my 35th Birthday.  I even formed a childish notion in my head of what the morning would hold. 

I would get up (turns out I almost didn’t get DOWN) and make coffee, text Mama that I was awake, and wait on her to arrive.  Whether Laurie was awake or not really didn’t figure into my little scenario.  At the designated time of her arrival, Mama would pull into the driveway in an SUV or a Minivan.  I wouldn’t know who it was, because that’s not her car, and I would scramble to put on some clothes appropriate for a guest.  Mama would get out and walk up to the house.  She’d say, "Happy Birthday!" and hand me the keys to the SUV/Van.

I guess it’s needless to say that didn’t happen.  I don’t know why I got so down about it, either.  I knew it was unrealistic.  We have been without a car for a while now, and nobody can AFFORD to buy us one.  I guess I still just think of birthdays as magical days.

My cousin Lance made me feel better a few minutes ago.  He texted asking how old I was.  35, he asked?  Yup, I replied.  He sent back that his mother was done using her walker and I could borrow it if I needed to.  That made me laugh.

So it’s 11:05am, and I have more than half the day left.  What will I make of it?  I don’t know yet.  Hopefully, it will be something positive!

Love to all,

Jack