Hometown

July 15, 2021 – 8:35 P.M.

Kail moved back home a few weeks ago. Home home, with our dad. We (Kail, Effie, mom and my neices) all banned together and drove 12ish hours.

I hadn’t really realized how long it had been since I’d been in my hometown but it has been so long I actually felt a little culture shocked. Which is very sad to say. I remember complaining to Kail about the drivers here and how people are SO uptight, grouchy, rude, etc. Like seriously no manners whatsoever. But I had been saying it so long I questioned if I had just romanticized my hometown having not been there in over 2 or so years. I’m very happy to say I was not romanticizing it, it is like I remember; people (men) holding doors open, warm small talk, courtesy smiles and waves. All the small town stuff. Traffic? Not bad or stressful at all even on a Saturday afternoon. It’s like all the things I have loved and been accustomed to all my life came flooding back and I was reminded why I don’t feel like I really fit in where I’m currently located. One thing I miss a lot is at night it is so quiet and dark. People inside their homes, not out running around like me so I get the town all to myself it feels. I just find it to be so mellow and comforting. I don’t feel on edge or in danger at night. I remember one summer night in particular with an old friend. We were at a park late at night, having finished a walk on the levee walking back to her car when the big sprinklers came on making us squeal and try to avoid getting sprayed. But then deciding it wasn’t a big deal and giving into it, running intentionally through them screaming and giggling. I still love the smell and sound of sprinklers running on summer nights. But anyways…

I’ve been thinking very recently of moving. Not home but to an area closer to home. The thought of going somewhere new makes me feel happy with possibility. Who knows what will actually happen. I’m going to work on my financial situation (pay off my auto loan, credit card bills) and work on my mental/physical health then go from there. All I can do now is daydream. New job, new atmosphere, personal growth. I know these things can happen where I’m st but you get what I mean. Fresh slate and all that.