It’s the slow song that’ll change your life

“…All my life I’ve like I’m incomplete/Well, here’s the new version of the old me/Take everything you know right now and turn it into something new…” ~ Backseat Goodbye

Very recently, tonight in fact, I read an entry where a friend of mine had a chance to change someone’s life just by relating and being there for them. It got me thinking.

I’m 30 years old and I definitely don’t have everything I want in this world- good job, house of my own, marriage, kids. But the one thing I do have is the knowledge that I’ve done the absolute best I could for the people who mean the most to me. I’m not the most sympathetic person when it comes to people getting themselves into negative situations and doing nothing about it but whining, but I empathize very well in any other situation. And I feel good about the fact that as of right now, I have five people in my life who give me a bit of credit for the fact that they’re still alive. Do you realize how huge that is? If you really think about it, do you honestly know how major something like that truly is? These aren’t people I rescued from a burning building. They aren’t people I pulled out of a car wreck. These are all good friends who all tell me that just the fact that I was around, that I chose to talk to them instead of going to a friend’s wedding or that I chose to stay up all night and talk with them for hours about nothing…or just the fact that we happened to meet on the day one had planned a suicide…are all reasons why I’m partly responsible for their still being alive today.

I believe everything happens for a reason, most definitely. But I also know that every decision I make is a conscious one. I’m not spontaneous and I don’t make spur-of-the-moment choices. I don’t know whether any of those outcomes would have been different had I been the type to make decisions on the fly, but it makes me glad that everything I do is well thought out.

Whatever the reasons for the way the world works, I’m grateful that you all, that my friends are such a huge part of my life and I’m grateful that I play some part in theirs.

A very lovely lady here on OD has recently become sort of a spiritual leader for me and we’ve talked about Astrology and numerology and all of that kind of thing. I can’t say I base my life around any of it, but I do find it interesting how very right-on a lot of that is. I’d say I fit my ‘Aquarius’ sign to a ‘t’. A read-through of a numerology page had said something that really rings so very true to me. In fact, I just mentioned it to Treve a few days before. He knows I’m very much an introvert and I don’t actively go out and meet new people or hang out with them in person if I can avoid it. So it’s not like I have a cell phone full of random important people who consistently need to get in touch with me. However, I had told him that if I turn off my phone for a day, I can easily turn it back on and have 10 different messages asking if I’ve died. 🙂 It’s a nice feeling that my group of friends is so lovely. I can’t remember if it was a site online or Kristine who said it, but the idea was, “your life is not your own. You belong to the public.” And one of the things Kristine most definitely had said to me was, “You must learn to live humbly in the limelight.” A piece of my heart does belong to you all!

With all of that said, I’m now going to tell you this. Nothing in life is an accident. When in doubt, choose to be there for people. You never know how one word, one sentence, one hour may change someone’s life forever. Be good to one another. Do good. If you leave a mark on someone’s life, let it be a positive one.