Being happy matters
Eventually I gained a greater understanding of existence, which, to be honest, is all guesswork anyway. But it’s guesswork I can be satisfied with, at least so far.
Here is what I have decided:
My own existence is undeniably true.
It’s ok that I exist because I am not alive. I am alive in the traditional sense of being not dead, but in reality, life is an illusion and “living” and “dead” are not real properties, just perceptions.
People (or really, anything “alive”) are just a sustained reaction. I think of it like a wildfire, but more advanced.
Just because I perceive objects in terms of reflected light doesn’t mean that it or any of my senses is their primary physical property, because there is no primary physical property.
Self awareness is just a side effect, and technically an illusion. There is no consciousness inside me, just brain impulses, and I will not be fooled into thinking I am anything more.
If all I need to do is be happy, I think I can do that. I will do what I think I should, and it will become correct.
Existence is what I make it, and nothing more.
Warning Comment
Gaining a greater understanding of anything is something to be proud of. I miss you.
Warning Comment
i am a random noter, obviously. but this reminded me of something by vonnegut i read once. i just can’t remember which book of his specifically.
Warning Comment
Oh My God this is so weird I was reading your diary earlier didn’t have time to leave you a note but you left me two? P.S you are kinda cute! (random I know!)
Warning Comment
RYN: You make a valid point, I’ve thought about it before and there’s very little in my diary I’d really be bothered by anybody reading. The thing that actually bothers me is that I’m oddly, um, embarrassed about the fact that I write about my friends in a diary? I suppose what I mean is that, it’s not the content of the diary I’d be embarrassed of people seeing so much as just the fact that I have a diary that I write about them in. I don’t think I come across as the sort of person who keeps a diary in person.
Warning Comment
no I haven’t ever been on a holiday… why?
Warning Comment
RYN: sometimes we lose ourselves in people for a split second because for some reason we find comfort in them like that boy with cancer found in you. And being happy does matter we owe it to ourselves after all.
Warning Comment
you’re probably right.
Warning Comment
what makes you happy?
Warning Comment
You return! And I am slack in my OD-ing! So wrong (on my part). This… is fabulous! And I took far too long in getting over here. Dude. Which may make this part seem less potent, though it’s still true, I’ve missed you! ryn: Vanilla Ice definitely seemed seeth-y still. So I feel better about missing him in concert. Heh. 🙂
Warning Comment
huh. i dont know about this nick, but i can’t come up with anything better.
Warning Comment
Just because you see something doesn’t mean it is really there. Life in itself is a perception just like your emotion to be happy. Good luck fellow….I have been on your road before and it wasn’t very long until something forced me to stray.
Warning Comment
Where did you go?
Warning Comment
Where aaaaaaaaaaaaare YOOOOOOOOOOOOOU?
Warning Comment