The things that remind me
So I went to a memorial today for my sister’s father in law. He was nice guy, but I don’t think he thought all that much of me.
Much like most people, I guess I’m not worth the effort.
I look around at the people who were friends to this man and friends to my brother in law and I hate myself. I don’t have friends like these. My sister is lapping up the attention. I have no clue who these people are and even if there are some in the crowd that know me they are avoiding me.
My head goes to Patty and the life she leads now. Did I keep her from friends? Is she more happy than I ever made her? Did she hate all the years with me? Is this the reason no one want to be with me?
No, she had kids with you, she didn’t hate the whole time with you. I think what happens so often is people evolve and change – not always in the same direction and these changes don’t make people compatible anymore. I loved my husband when we married. Our reason for divorcing is completely different than yours, but I see it among people all the time; growing apart, growing in different directions, changing.
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I agree with strawberry jelly.  Surely she felt love for you while she was having your kids together.  There had to be some good years there.  I can’t imagine not being with the man that I had all my kids with.
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