Just sad

Ibmiss having someone to talk to. There’s one person who would talk, but everytime we do she gets the wrong impression and I just can’t get her hopes up. Yes, that sounds horrible, but I just don’t feel the way she does. Yes, I whine about being alone, but sometimes you want what you want and don’t want what’s offered.

I took the older boys to dinner and they came back for a couple hours. I just can’t wrap my head around the ” new” relationship with all my boys. I want to move on and hate Patty for pushing into this. I can’t though and that’s what causing me all this anxiety and depression. I just feel she owes me a conversation.