Annoyed
I know I’m supposed to be past this, but it still irrates the f$%$ out of me. My ex and the new guy have been up each other’s ass since I moved out and he moved in. For more than 3 years there has been absolutely no time they’ve not been together. They work together too.
What makes me just livid is the fact that she never took the time to think about it all. Never alone to wonder, ponder and even miss me and what I did for her.
To late now, damage is done. He turned her totally against me in every way. This just sucks having no one to talk too or just forget things with..
Done whining 😑
Right, she never had to experience being alone or given any time to even miss you. How can she just jump from a long term relationship straight into a new one??
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What do you want to talk about?
What things do you want to forget?
@ncumisa You know, IDK, but you would think a 20yr relationship, 4 children, deaths, births, tragedies, and triumphs would be a reason to have talked whether the marriage was over or could be fixed. Not ” I want a divorce ” and then literally nothing at all. I’m guessing even the most hateful marriage still has something the two can talk about or explain. The way she did this makes it feel like she made a total mistake from day one with me, never appreciated what my family did for her, and regrets having the kids with me. Say what you want, the only person who can convince me otherwise is her.
Have you asked her all this? I personally think it is only fair for you to want the answers and she should give them to you. But you also got to be prepared for the fact that she might not have answers for you and if she does they might not be what you want to hear.
But why do you want to know? Isn’t the fact that she changed her mind and the way she has acted enough for you to just want to have a cordial relationship, for the sake of your children and your personal sanity. You deserve more that what she can obviously give you and you deserve to find your new story. So as hard as it is, let the past go and only hold on what you want to from it, ie. your children
@ncumisa You know I seriously don’t know why. I’ve been told I have Borderline Personality Disorder and a big part of it is abandonment issues. I was a momma’s boy and have always longed for that attachment of “unconditional love” I guess.
I lost it when my daughter died, then my Mom, then Patty left me, and finally my sister’s reaction and treatment. It all ripped me apart to a point where I feel unloved and unloved, which is a big trigger of my BPD. I’m still here so I have learned to regulate, but it feels like treading water.
I am sorry you feel the way that you do and about your condition. Honestly I too have abandonment issues, so I tend to not get too close or let myself be dependent on people I feel I cannot trust.
I really hope eventually you will be able to seek professional help for this.
😘
@ncumisa Oh, I have, a reason why I do this and why I am on this side of the dirt. But, there comes a point with therapy where it’s like learning to ride a bike and you either get it or don’t. In my opinion anyway…
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