Afternoon crap

Well where to start?

Wanted to take my son for the weekend for his birthday. I was just told by her I can’t and of course like always there is absolutely no explanation.  3 f@#$ing years and after a half day, I can never get an answer from her. What a monster I must have been..

Which comes on the heals of learning I may have a form of blatter cancer. My test came back with signs of high grade Urothelial carcinoma, or at least I think that’s how it’s spelt.

The world seems to want me to be an asshole. An asshole to deal with my manchild whiny bitch boy attitude and it also wants me to be an asshole so it can still look down on me for being one. I have to realize I’m just never going to win.

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March 24, 2022

Oh no!  When will you know something for sure about your bladder?  I know that is so scary.

That’s just wrong she won’t let you have your son for his birthday weekend?  How old is your son?  Do you think it’s her or do you think it’s him not wanting to?

March 24, 2022

@happyathome Probably her, maybe him. Not that he doesn’t want to, rather he probably was grounded. I do try to co-parent like that and his actual birthday is next Wednesday. But yeah, she is a b%^&*.

I go in a couple of weeks for a cat scan and *GULP* the Cystoscopy. He better take me to dinner after that..

March 25, 2022

@newt316 Well keep us updated on that.  I hate that you have to wait weeks to have it done.  They must not be too worried.

March 25, 2022

That’s such garbage. I can’t stand how she treats you. I’ll keep you in my thoughts for your further tests. Hugs to you.

April 1, 2022

I really hope you are okay, and that everything works out for you, no matter what!

Maybe this may be silly, but why don’t you write your son letters, and even if you don’t send them to him now, later when you can you give them to him. I know it is silly and such a movie story theme, but I think it is nice, and it would be nice for your son to one day know that you were thinking of him and wanting to see him, even though his mother was making it hard or he didn’t want to.

Stay strong and hope it all works out!

April 1, 2022

@ncumisa You brought up a thought. Back when my oldest and his brother went through I think 1st grade, me and the ex wrote them letters for the future.  Now the letters seem so silly and obviously not true anymore.

April 1, 2022

That is nice that you wrote them letters, even though they may not be relevant anymore. I think it will still be nice for you to do that now again. Even if you don’t ever give them the letters, I feel that writing my thoughts helps release whatever good/bad I am feeling; I am sure you and everyone else on OD feel the same.