Last Night he Held ME!!

Last night I let him sleep in our bed.

We watched “Inventing Anna”. I have watched it already but he is watching it and getting into it…and enjoying it. While we watched he let me snuggle in his arms. Being in his arms is my favorite spot! I love his warmth and that feeling of security in him.

Throughout the night I could feel him hold me.

He goes on about how he doesn’t trust himself to be away from me, right now.

Yesterday I made a friend off Al-anon. She lives in JHB and her partner is an alcoholic and he has just been sober for 100 days. I told her how I worry that I cannot trust him to never drink again. This isn’t the first saga. She told me that I will most likely never be able to be certain.

But I love him and everything is so good right now!

He is all about having schedules and plans for the week and weekend and for us to keep active. I like that, and am happy he is on this track, but part of me is worried it will come crashing down.

Last night I downloaded some movies for him to watch.

• Moneyball
• The Way Back
• Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

I want to find more so we can both watch them and see that there can be light at the other side of the tunnel.

I spoke to my father yesterday,  and he told me how he needs to go back to rehab and needs to get on the right path. It felt good that my father wasn’t telling me to end things and he was being supportive, even though he was being protective of me still and wanting to make sure I was alright and he emphasized how I must know that I always have him and my sisters for support and that they are never going anywhere.

Right now I am feel optimistic and I really want to hold on and make us work.