He Wants to Make it Right!

Yesterday he apparently called my father and they had a chat. My father is away but when he comes back he wants to meet my father and work on making things right. He said my father told him that he has to prove to him that he can change and make things right before he could forgive him.

My husband told me that since he has opened up to my father and admitted how he kept things from me, that I can tell my family everything. Little does he know that my family kinda already knows everything and what I haven’t told them they are suspicious of, already. My oldest sister and I chat a lot and she has always been there for me, but she knows as soon as I go off the grid or when I don’t say much, that something is wrong, so she sensed something was wrong ages ago.

I still don’t know how to feel, but a huge part of me wants to give him the chance to make things right.

 I am going back on what I ranted on a few posts ago…and a few posts before that…and a few posts before that…

 I keep forgiving him and I keep justifying it and I keep throwing in the towel!

 Who is perfect?

 keep making the same mistakes over and over again?

And now that he is in a more sound mind, I am prepared to have the talk with him and find out exactly what he meant by what he said and how he feels about that. I mean I know in my heart that he had to have meant what he said, on some level, in order to have said them, but I will hear him out. I am still hurt by what he said. And maybe we should go back to the therapist and have it out with her there to mediate the conversation…but then again he can be Mr. Smooth Talker…

Last night we started reading the above book together. Well I read it out while he listened, but it was nice. We just read the introduction. I have to say that whoever edited the book did a really bad job, as the writing is not good at all. But it is a good read.

I think it is important for more  to stand up and be advocates for addictions and down falls. More  need to tell their story;

so other  know that being weak or failing isn’t a bad thing.

so other  know how to treat women and those they claim to love.

so other  can learn how to be grateful for what they have.

so other  know that they are not on their own and can reach our for help.

 have this stigma that they have to be…

and so much more.

I just need him to be honest and loyal and dependable and loving. The rest I know will all fall in place and isn’t the reason, why we get married, is to find that other half of our whole that completes us?