Child Sitting
It is a long weekend and my husband and I offered to have his cousins son over at us for the weekend. We’ll Fri – Sunday. Tonight we plan on just having some time to ourselves, before spending Monday getting ready for the short work week.
Anyway….I love kids but his really find this one a serious energy drain and rather rude without even knowing it and he just irritates me.
He says stuff and even though I appreciate him being honest comes across as rude. We don’t have honey in the flat. But he liked peanut butter and honey as supposed to with jam. So he tells me that he thinks I should get honey.
He goes on to tell me that the fridge is empty so there is nothing there for him to eat.
And oh my gosh is he so particular about everything….
And it is a lil annoying when you hear him talk to himself and the cartoon in the TV.
After reading all that it makes you wonder how I could want a child, but the child would be mine and I would have raised it so it will be more respectable or I would be used to it. And of course my childhood will be perfect in my eyes.
On Friday after speaking to my sister at work, I was meant to phone her yesterday, but been so busy. So will talk to her later when I have more time to myself.
Last night a wrote a letter to my husband, which I need to print out and give to him. I am a lil worried about how he will take it and not sure…
LETTER TO MY HUSBAND
WORK 30 April 2022
You and I have been through a lot over the years. I know I have played a part in the tension between you and my family and in the financial, emotional, physical and health stresses we have had and still currently do have.
Before I go into the reason behind this letter; I need you to also feel free to be honest about how you feel and what you want/need.
There are a numerous things that I need and want for both of us to do and I don’t want us to just agree to things and not follow through with them.
Please note this is not an ultimatum or a bashing. But I need us to move forward and grow.
1. MAKE PEACE WITH MY FAMILY
– I don’t know how you are going to do this, but they are going to need more than just words.
– I know my mouth has been a huge contribution to this tension, but your actions have been a bigger contribution and without me having even said anything, they have seen and assumed things
2. TAKE ON MORE IN OUR LIFE
– I know that due to my controlling, taking on everything when you first moved down, and let’s not forget about my stubbornness and laziness, thigs have fallen on me. I need you to please take on some stuff and take on the initiative.
• Finances
• Accounts
• Running and Organizing Things
3. ME
– I know you love me
– But I am a material person (remember in marriage prep we learnt that each person has their own LOVE LANGUAGE)
4. CASA MESS
– I am untidy too but together we need to work on keeping the casa clean besides the wash and use only.
* Put clothes and shoes away or at least keep things neat
* Prevent things from piling up
* Keep the bathroom & kitchen clean
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?
1. ON MYSELF
– Lose weight
– Look good and be of value
2. BE A BETTER WIFE
– Show my love for you more
– Listen and take on your suggestions more
– Follow your lead
– Wear my ring and be worthy of wearing it and not keep giving it back to you when we don’t meat eye to eye
– Cook, Clean and create a Home for us
– Give us a child
– Be more social and accepting
– Manage my stresses better
Let me know if there is anything else that you would like me to work on.
About your recovery. I am happy for you that you are on this path and I do support you and will continue to do so however I can. But the things you have said and done to me have really hurt me and I am not over them. I am going to need more than just words or you going to AA and having a sponsor. And I don’t mean a kiss or back rub.
I do love you and hope that we can get over and move passed all this.
I wish life was easier to navigate through.