Last Friday I read the Parasha for the week and as confusing as it was, with all the talk of how Hashem instructed the Ark and Tabernacle to be built and listed the various Golds and Copper and Linens and where it must all be used, I just got so confused about what everything was for and where it was going and since I jumped into the parasha I didn’t quite know exactle where the Israelites where and what was happening in the Torah at that stage.
Anyway…while I was reading it I was trying to remember how my Shul Arc was set up and if it matched all that Hashem instructed. I went a lil further and started thinking about my home and what I want for it and how I would make it more of a Jewish Home. Then my mind started thinking about other stuff about my life and the path that I am walking and how I need to fix it all and get on the right path.
My sister also sent me a snippet of the Parasha where the Bibas name, although spelt backwards, is menioned 3 times…and this past Wednesday Shiri, Ariel and Kfir wher burried.
Makes you wonder… I could never look at Hashem in a negative way but why did this Parasha and the events that occured now coincide and does Hashem want his children to feel such pain? I cannot imagine what Yaarden and his family is going through right now.
Did a goodle search now to find out what the Parasha is telling us..
but…
What does Exodus 25 teach us?
Our giving is first of all giving to God
I am all for giving to Hashem. That is what I aspire to do everyday in some way…
but when will I see the benefits and gifts from him in return?
I mean I know that I have life and he spared my life many times; may that be through survivng an accident, saving me from suicidal thoughts and actions and just being able to live everyday, Hashem sure has blessed me.
On Friday I went to shul and it was so uplifting beign in shul and being able to be part of a minyan…but what was even greater was how full the shul was. It was so shul that people had to share sidurim and late comers had to sit on pastic chairs from the dining hall.
A couple of weeks ago the owner of the store that I work in was in town and he pulled me aside to tell me that I was not allowed to wear my Yellow Ribbon pin… 
and he gave me 2 reasons for that…
The first was because he didn’t want to possibly cause any political chaos in the store…and I get that. Just imagine a fight happening at work and people destoying all the inventory or attacking me or anyone else in the store because of my pin. I mean that has never been close to happening, in fact many Jewish customers thanked me for wearing it and often we remarked hwo we were both wearing it.
The second reason he gave me for him not wanting me to wear it is because 
. When he whispered that to me, I immdiately lost all respect for him and just wish I was in a positiom where I could resign on the spot.
Does he not know that 85% if not more of his cusomers are Jewish?
What about all those innocent lives that were lost on Octover 7th 2023, and since? Yes, Jewish/Israeli/Foreigners all those hostages? Yes, I do feel for the Palestinian Civillians who have lost their lives and homes…but for that I blame Hamas and over the last few months I have started to feel as if their are in fact no innocent Palestinians and they may not be part of Hamas directly but they hae cheered Hamas and their puppets along and have assisted in the vile actions that have taken place.
Anyway…I find myself really wanting to leave my place of work as I find it really damaging to be working for someone who is so false; he sells to Jews and sells a lot of Jewish Jewellery, yet he is so hateful. Or maybe it isjust his
?
In shul I saw someone wearing this lovely necklace that I would love to get…
but since the only jewllery I can wear can be that from the store or company I work for, I would never get the chance to wear it…
.
