Polite

Sometimes I hate being polite. And sometimes, I hate it when people feel the need to be polite to others that don’t deserve it.

The other day I was coming home from my brothers house. Was a little
BBQ he was having, withs oem friends over. it was fine and all, except
there was one person who never shut up about anything. Everything about
this person just annoyed me. Later I came to realize he was gay, but
that wasn’t a big deal, it was the fact that he kept insisting I
participate in conversations HE was carrying about his friends and
people I don’t know.  I don’t know these people, so I have nothing
to say. Asking me all these questions that I had no answers for about
myself, becuase really, I don’t like to talk to people I just met.
anyone that knows me can testify to that. thats just who I am. It’s my
little screening process.

but anyways, I
was polite and answered best I could, short answers hoping that he
would undertstand I’m not in a social mood. He didn’t. whatever. 
On my way home, I had to goto the bathroom. So, I stopped in a Perkins
in Forest Lake. Went inside to the bathroom, and came out. Insticntivly
I looked back in the smoking section, thats where a lot of my friends
usually sat and ate, often nightly.  Well, they were there.
However, so as Cassie. So, without missing a beat, I just walked out
and got in my car. I thought, well, I might as well call one of them,
say I thought I saw them and to ay Hi.  I mean after all, these
were the people that said “gimmie a call sometime, unless you don’t
like me anymore that is.”

So, I tried
calling one, her phone had incoming calls blocked. Ok then. this isn’t
my normal cell phone, as that one is still deactivated. So, I call a
different one. I recognized her car from the fact that there was no
grill. However, this happened to be Cassie’s sister. But whatever. I
said Hi, she asked what I was doing, then she said Well i gotta go. I’m
here with some friends. I said, oh OK, sorry to bother ya. She said
It’s no bother, it’s just I’m here with.. friends and it’s rude to talk
on the phone.

Ok. Well, I said
bye and hung up. I was driving at the tim and mised my turn. so, I turn
around in a gas staton and notice Cassie’s car sittin all the way over
here. Odd.

I find it odd
because the only reason I can think of is so that nobody see’s her car
out front (nobody being me) and go in to see her.  Like a stalker.

Well, this pissed
me off. I tried to keep in touch after she broke up with me as to her
request. She changed her number or canceled her phone (doubtful) so I
couldn’t talk to her. I asked a friend of ours, she said her phone was
canceled, but this girl lies a lot, so i don’t buy it. I only wanted to
get my car key back and give her keys back to her. I’m not interested
in talking to her about anything. I’m sure we’d have nothing to say
anyways.  But now, I feel that all these friends are no longer
friends and just being polite.

Fuck that.

I’d rather they just say, Please don’t call me, Or get your stuff and
leave me alone, Or sorry but I think you’re jsut too sexy for me to be
seen with you.

You know, the usual.

But they don’t.
So instead, I have to jsut deal with the fact that if I don’t contact
these people, they’ll try to guilt me because I didn’t. But if I do,
they try to blow me off as if I’m pestering them.

Well fuck it.
Fuck them. and Fuck these friendships. They can blow me if they want
to, but more likely they’ll just think that I’m a needy person who’s
trying to keep them at my side. 

And why don’t I tell them this? Well, I told you earlier.

I hate being the polite one.

As always,
James
AIM/MSN: Ziktick(@hotmail.com for MSN users) feel free to contact me. – jhoffoss@gmail.com
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