Worth reposting

I have been reviewing my diary and designating entries into chapters where appropriate. One thing I observe is that I’ve reached a point in time where I’m inclined to stop. There is a similar point in Vroenis beyond which any entries earlier are simply lacking or perhaps… not immature exactly, but perhaps not mature enough.

So I end my reviewing by reposting an extract from the entry where I stopped. It was titled “Walking through the empty age”, which is the title of the song that plays at the conclusion of the anime series Texhnolyze.

Put your arms around me, Ichise
Can’t you see…
This is what my Texhnolyze is for
This is our prayer now
That everything we use to fear and hate is intended for love
And we will all die learning it

I wrote that briefly after separating from my then partner in August of 2006. Clearly divorced now from the emotion of the experience, I find that the ideology still rings true, in many more ways than the one that I applied it to. Of-course, even then I knew that I included the examination of my personal events into the examination of all things.
While I’m not in the habit of mourning humanity, or indeed my own personal trials, there is something powerful about so a saddening an acknowledgement. It reminds me of my own agility, it reminds me of my own expression and how long it has been evolving and developing. Retrospect is always an interesting exercise, and as I regard myself now, I’m in a place I would never have imagined, even then; already having decent indication of my illness.

I’ve never been more isolated than I am now, yet I’ve never felt more at home in my world. My world; the one made of things that were given to me, and things I crafted myself. It’s a very exclusive place, and never before have I been so strict on the permissions I grant to others.

In the past, I would romantically note that the plural you are running out of time.
At present, I’m inclined to state that the time has already run out, and you are far too late.